Neon Toppa EVA Lagann
by The Qing
Summary: Just as the battle with the 14th Angel takes a turn for the worst, a mysterious red robot covered with drills crashes in from the heavens; changing the course of the fight and the EVA universe forever. Evangelion/Gurren Lagann crossover. Summary within.
1. Introjection?

NEON TOPPA EVA LAGANN

Disclaimer: I don't own either franchise, otherwise this would happen. And none of the songs either.

Author Note: I just felt, well, the idea just popped into my head and kinda…'spiraled'. For fans of the shows, I may be stretching the suspension of disbelief to breaking point by assuming the Dirac Sea created by Unit-04's failed activation and Gurren Lagann's premiere Giga Drill Breaker would make conditions for the latter to actually pierce through to the Eva Universe, but, well, they seemed to mesh. I'm not even sure this fic is going to work, so I'll be depending on your reception to see if I should pursue this. Enjoy the show!

Plot Summary (Evangelion): As the battle with the 14th angel takes a turn for the worst, a strange red robot covered in drills emerges from the Dirac Sea to confront the invader. No matter who wins, when the dust settles, questions will be asked. What is it, some type of angel, a secret weapon of some foreign agency? How come it has two faces and why is it wearing shades on one of them? And do reports of a loud, tattooed shirtless man raising havoc all over Tokyo 3 have something to do with it?

Plot Summary (Gurren Lagann): The Giga Drill Breaker Finishing Move was executed successfully, but for unforeseen reasons has taken the irrepressible founders of the Dai-Gurren-Dan, to yet another battle but with an injured Kamina and little energy. Even if they win, what awaits them in this strange new world of towering monsters, glittering buildings, and little optimism? Can they heal Kamina in time? Can they find their way back home? And can Lagann really combine with that giant, lanky, purple Gunman?

Soundtrack: Eva Lagann will utilize a soundtrack to help better convey the mood of the scenes it entails. The music will range from pieces from both the shows as wells as ones that aren't. Though not necessary by any means, if you possess these songs in your library, you may play them at certain intervals designated by their respective number codes. Say a track is marked (x) on the chapter's playlist, then when the bold parenthesizes (x) appears in the story, that is the moment the track should be played. I'm not sure if this'll work, or if my song choices are any good, but give it a chance, all right? If you do not have these songs, check out the link in my profile on where you may legally stream them.

**(1)** The Other Promise (Piano Version) by Hiroyuki Nakayama

**(2)** EM21_Demo by Sagisu Shirou

**(3)** L'Attaque Des Anges by Sagisu Shirou

**(4)** Ode to Joy (Choir) by Beethoven

**Episode 1: Introjection? or Like Hell I'll Retreat When One of Our Faces Still Works!!!**

_"A Butterfly possesses the unique distinction of living twice and dying twice. For when it's luminescent eyes open from its broken shell, the worm dies and death approaches over the mountains to claim it once more..."_

**(1)**

Times like these were what nightmares were made of. In fact, the purple haired Major desperately wanted this to be one, at the very least she could wake up from it. But no, cruel as it was, this was reality.

The gaping hole in the GeoFront's roof was real. The wind carrying smoke and the aroma of blood that whipped through her hair was real. The snapped trees, the burning earth, all of it. And the horrible clanging of sharp metallic arms crushing armor was very very real.

Reality lay bare in her mind, its boils and wounds drowning hope and will with blood and puss.

The 14th Angel had appeared as abruptly as the others had before, seemingly out of nowhere. And like its predecessors, wasted no time trying to reach Terminal Dogma, callously destroying everything in its way.

To its credit, despite its huge bulk, deadly sheet-like arms and powerful energy weapon, it only attacked those obstructing its path. When it did though, the obstuction was dealt with, in a quick and deadly fashion.

Unit 02, beheaded and literally disarmed.

Unit 00, charred to a metallic crisp.

Misato tried not to think of their pilots.

"Where the hell did you come from?" she asked silently. It was a question she often asked herself when confronted by these monstrosities. They didn't rise from some crypt or come through some portal like all those gaudy horror movie monsters. These…things just came out of nowhere. One minute they were descending from space, they next they were being found in volcanoes and just when you thought it was safe to swin in the ocean, they were coming out to devour you from the sea.

It didn't make sense; nothing did when dealing with the angels. Tactics and strategies created from previous battles were all but useless in the next. And they had tried everything on this one short of doing a dance routine or jumping into a volcano. All armaments had failed, the N2 Mine had failed, the outer shielding of the GeoFront had failed to keep it out for more than a minute.

She could still remember that horrendous despair overtake her soul as it descended on them. Like its namesake, coming down from a higher place to bring judgment and damnation on them all. And to have it come so close, its malformed skull for its face impassive and glowing, was sublime as it was terrifying.

Shinji, bless his fickle heart, charged in as the monster prepared to fire. Despite Unit 01 losing an arm in the attempt, it still managed to grind the Angel's face into catapult's wall as the two rapidly ascended to the surface. And for a brief moment as she, Ritsuko and the rest of the Bridge crew followed, she allowed a small degree of hope to swell in her soul.

And now, here they were, watching as the beast known as Zeruel mercilessly pounded and blasted the motionless and depowered Evangelion. It didn't seem fair, after it had beaten Rei and Askua's EVAs it had left them alone, beaten but still alive. But now it seemed intent on making Shinji pay for its unpleasant elevator ride.

"_Probably because he gave the biggest fight."_ She thought with bitter pride. For all NERV had done to the boy, even after having him hurt one of his best friends, he still came back to help them. No doubt he was currently struggling in the EVA's cockpit, desperately trying to awaken the sleeping behemoth. _"Perhaps purely for his own survival, but if that were the case he wouldn't have fought in the first place. So, it's for us. Damn it, he came back for us."_

It wasn't fair, she found herself thinking again, but then, nothing in this world was.

She cringed slightly as Zeruel tore through another plate of Unit 01's armor. It must have been hell to be trapped inside that thing, unable to move, powerless to act, he might as well have been standing next to her watching the carnage, instead of screaming in the dark, alone, bathed in the red of the emergency lights.

The Angel continued to pound at the Evangelion's chest, ripping more and more armor off of it. Misato's intense gaze was on the verge of tearing away when the last sheet of purple metal fell to reveal a large red orb in the giant's torso, surrounded by dirty pink veins and sickly red flesh.

"That's…" she began to say, though most knew what it was already. Unit 01's core, its center of power, weakspot and the cradle for its pilot, now lay exposed to the deadly sheet-like arms of the merciless beast.

The sound of gritting teeth filled Misato's ears, and she couldn't tell if it was hers that were doing it or those of the small group of people around her. Zeruel's right arm pulled back with a graceful fluidity that belied its fatal nature and with only a second's hesitation lunged at the crimson vessel.

It would've undoubtedly struck if not for the sudden quake.

**(2)**

The quake came suddenly, without the slightest of a tremor preceding it. The Major and the rest of the bridge crew staggered, some barely keeping their balance, some failing completely to do so.

Leaves were shaken out of their trees, the lake churned and swelled as if boiling, even Zeruel swayed slightly as the ground violently shook.

"What the hell is going on? It feels like the whole Geofront is breaking apart!" Misato tried to shout as she lost the battle with equilibrium, falling on her knees upon the still shaking earth.

"I-I d-don't know!" Maya cried, clutching at the laptop she had brought along to monitor Unit 01. "But a massive energy reading just appeared onscreen."

"From the angel?" her senior, Dr. Akagi asked, the desperation in her voice shielding it from stuttering.

"No, it's, it's coming from above us!" the technician cast a nervous glance to the damaged dome, still sporting the hole the Angel had created. "But whatever it is, it's breaking through the shields!"

A sarcastic laugh penetrated the cacophonic rumbling. "Another hole in the shields?" Hyouga snickered bitterly. "The Commander's going to be real happy about that!"

"Forget the commander! Maya is it another…" Misato bit her lip, she didn't want to think of the possibility, but it had to be brought up. "Is it another Angel?"

Maya's hands swiftly glided over the trembling keyboard. "Scanning, the reading is…" Her eyes widened. "G-Green? A-and, its breached layers 14, no 15-I mean 16, I-I-!"

Then the ceiling above them exploded.

"**-EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!!!!!!!" **a massive voice screamed from above.

And for the second time that day, another gaping hole was violently carved out of NERV HQ's roof.

Whatever had done it was fast, though Misato could see that the object was spinning, metal and propelled by a blazing otherwordly flame spewing from behind it.

It smashed into one of the artifical mountains. The impact sent one last wave of vibrations before a huge cloud of dust and smoke blasted out of the site.

"Wh-what the hell?" Misato wobbled, the lingering affects of the quake still having a hold on her legs. "Anyone…anyone see?" She shook her head, trying to remove the dizziness from it, then cast a desperate glance at the swirling cloud. "Does anyone-anyone have anything we can use to take a closer look!" Her glance moved to Maya, Hyouga, Aoba, but all shook their heads. _"Damnit, where's a telescope when you need one!"_

"Cameras." A stern sound huffed from below.

Misato turned to the downed doctor. "What?"

"There are surveillance modules around the complex." Ritsuko held a hand up, which Misato practically yanked to get the doctor back on her feet, and to her explanation. "Ow…The ones directly near it are probably shot, due to the impact, but if we use the ones around it we may be able to see what it is." She rubbed her hand, sore from her friend's grip. "Maya?"

"I can't promise we'll get a clear picture, but I'll try." The laptop screen flashed, shifting from directory, to sub-directory, to sub-sub directory until a small window popped into view. "Nothing but dust from this one." The window closed, and was quickly replaced by another. "Nothing here." Another window. "Nothing." Another window. "Nothing." Another window, this time depicting what looked like a urinal. "Damn, not even close."

"They have cameras in the washrooms?" Aoba asked a bit too eagerly.

Maya paused, letting out a sigh. "Try not to think about it." She began to type again. "Finally! It's coming into focus and-what-what the hell?"

Everyone crowded around the small screen, trying to make sense of the peculiar sight that seemed to stare at them from the video stream.

The dust had cleared, though for what they were seeing, it might as well have remained. It was a machine, humanoid in shape and design with a red-black-yellow paintjob. That was what was normal to them. They noticed its body first, splayed on the ground, and covered in what appeared to be spikes, with its limbs in disarray.

Where the lower torso should have been was a black rectangular cavity with four pointed spikes jutting out of its upper and lower corners. Its chest was covered with a large jagged piece of black metal that slanted upwards down the middle. A crack in the sheet revealing two yellow orbs behind it.

"Its body sort of, looks like a face." Hyouga observed.

"I know right? That's what I thought when I first saw it!" His fellow officer began pointing at the mecha. "The spikes on the side are teeth, the hole in its lower stomach is like a mouth, the yellow orbs are its eyes and…" Her finger lingered on the jagged black obstruction attached to it. "I'm not really sure what that's supposed to be…"

"Shades?" their longhaired peer offered.

He was rewarded with a sharp flick to his forehead. "Don't be stupid Aoba," Misato reprimanded. "Why would a robot wear sunglasses?"

"Ow!"

Ritsuko pushed the two aside to better scrutinize the screen's contents. "I'm wondering why it's wearing a helmet of all things." True enough, its silver steel head (the one atop the torso) was covered by a helmet as red as its body, decorated by a somewhat charred ornament of a large crescent moon. "And why it's covered in…what the hell are they doing?"

The dozens of spires on the red machines body began to sink into its metallic frame. The scene was reminiscent of a blowfish deflating. The difference being that while the blowfish reverted into its less intimidating state as its barbs retreated, the mecha remained dismally gargantuan

"Well we can see it a bit better with all those, whatever they were, out of the way." Hyouga observed.

Misato gave the bespectacled technician a look. "Not that it helps any, but didn't you notice that those things were…were…" but the reprimand was left hanging, wanting. Yet she was so sure she had known what those conic shapes were, the word was on the tip of her tongue. Then it had soured, and its bitter taste was already making its way to the mind that had spawned it. She felt sick, almost as if the act of conceiving the word was choking her throat in reprimand. "…never mind."

"Major Katsuragi, are you all right?" Maya turned to look at her superior officer, it would be hard to miss the relief in her eyes. Observing the machine had proven to be awkwardly taxing. She didn't know if it was from staring at the screen for too long, or the outright madness of the day, but fatigue started to claw at her temples, it was getting harder to pay attention. The distraction that was Misato was thus, quite welcome, and preferable too…whatever was making that horrendous grinding noise.

Somehow when the two-faced robot started to sit itself up, the entire bridge crew of NERV was conveniently distracted. Slowly staggering to its feet, pressing its grey right hand against its stomach to stem the flow of crimson gushing from it, and looking tiredly at the seemingly forgotten Angel failed to elicit the barest flicker of attention from the people it had so fascinated barely a moment before. If it was capable of indignation, it needn't have fretted, for the Angel had been watching, had even stopped assaulting its purple assailant to completely assess this new element. And that is probably why it shot a blast of energy whose fury could turn buildings to slag, at the hapless war machine.

**(3)**

The sudden explosion was enough to rouse Misato from her delirium, and the sick crack the red mecha made upon being slammed into the Geofront's wall did wonders in bringing the rest back into reality. The former clutched her head in a manner reminiscent of what she would have done after a night of very heavy drinkning. "…ohhhh, damn. Feels like I've been drinking for-for," the eye not hidden behind her palm snapped open at seeing Zeruel slowly hover to where the crimson mecha was struggling to right itself. "The Angel, it's stopped attacking Unito 01 and, oh my god…" From where she was, the movement was small, slight, a small trickle of liquid quickness dribbling from the robot's torso. "Is that LCL?"

Maya, who had also recovered from her grogginess had opened another surveillance stream. "It might be, if it's anything like an Eva the plug must've been ruptured. But it's still moving."

That it was. Already it had managed to lift its uncannily human face to send a look of pure fury at its attacker. A zoom in revealed that the steel teeth in its mouth were actually gritting.

"So it's either the LCL of the machine or…"

"-The blood of its pilot…" Ritsuko finished.

The two faced robot had managed to get itself back on its feet again. Shakily, its right hand raised itself to the jagged black sheet on its chest. One could say it was the shaking one does in excitement, nervousness, or a miniscule spasm spawned from agony. Nevertheless the trembling extremity gripped the side of the sheet, and ripped it of its body. This accomplished two things, it allowed those around it a better view of its second set of eyes and gave it a gigantic makeshift blade.

Strange how its being removed from its second face made the blade look even more like a giant pair of sharp sunglasses.

Realizing what it probably intended to do brought back memories of much better armed and honestly more imposing mechas falling to the 14th angel through Aoba's already fevered mind. "It can't be serious…" he choked.

A quick flash of green in its eyes and the rapid bounding of its hydraulic legs signaled that whoever was piloting that thing, was in fact, very serious.

Zeruel's arms, which it had mercifully sheathed as it made its way to its new target unfurled and those deadly ribbons once more, commenced their dance macabre. To say they were like snakes would be a great disservice to reptiles of that type. After all, the arms of the angel lacked even the barest amount of mercy and there was no antidote for the wounds they made; save euthanasia.

The red robot didn't know that, and even if it did, it's rage would've burnt through whatever dissuading material nipped at its will. That's why as the twin folds of death lunged at it, weapons that had cut through the armor of Evangelion's like butter, it swung its broken black shades at them…and parried the blow.

NERV's finest looked at the scene in disbelief. The charge had revealed just how puny the scarlet vindicator was compared to the Angel. It would probably be up to an EVA's knee if they were put side by side and yet it had managed to repel an attack that had disabled Unit 02 in seconds.

Whether Zeruel was perturbed by this development was impossible to discern from its face, but Misato thought she saw its arms surge forward just a little bit faster.

The distance between the battered machine and the Angel was closing with surprising swiftness. But as the beast's attacks quickened the scarlet mech's charge slowed. At first its abrupt assault had allowed it to advance fairly quickly, running several yards after dodging or parrying one of Zeruel's strikes. Now it found itself rooted to one spot, the attacks of the 14th angel having become far too fast for it to even take a step. Not a second would pass after knocking away one of its arms when another would try to attack.

The constant barrage was beginning to affect the smaller being. Its body was beginning to stagger under the weight of each strike, causing it to sway left, right and even back. The helmeted visage once twisted with anger, was beginning to sag with exhaustion.

Far from slowing down, the Angel's attacks intensified, becoming more savage and frantic as if hungry for their stubborn prey. Yet in doing so they became less accurate, losing the precision that had made them overwhelmingly powerful. Some would skim and slice at their enemy's limbs, while others outright missed.

It was during one of these close shaves that the red robot twisted its body to avoid. The arm holding the giant sun glasses outstretched, it span on its toe, until at last with the rough majesty one associates with seeing a bear fish a salmon out of a roaring river, threw the enormous spectacles at the massive creature.

For all its size and bizarre shape, the gaudy spectacles proved a deadly projectile, cutting through the air and becoming a bladed black blur to the naked eye.

As grand as the sight was, the blonde researcher of the spectators was skeptical. "It won't work." Her eyes downcast as the statement left her lips. "Unit 01 is no longer neutralizing the Angel's AT Field."

Almost in tandem, an orange hexagonal flash illuminated the darkened Geofront, and the once unstoppable black blade bounced off the angel's AT field. It's motion ceased, it hung in the air, all of its kinetic energy sapped like so many bullets, bombs and missiles that had attempted to cross that same nigh-impassable barrier.

The Angel retaliated in kind, shooting its other arm at its now unarmed target. Said target crouched, but made no other motion to dodge the attack. Maybe it was tired, maybe the joints of its limbs were locked from all of Zeruel's attacks; The arm of the Angel didn't care. So the idea that the machine was baiting it, confirmed as it leaped just in time to dodge the sheet, never passed through the monster's head.

A fantastic clamour of metal on otherwordly alloy signaled the contact the reckless machine's feet made as they slammed into the sheet. Like any cloth would do, it contorted to accommodate the weight but its supernatural qualities prevented the black-red legs from breaking through it. The daredevil jumped once more, this time directly at the misshapen skull of Zeruel, the massive shades still suspended in the air. Grabbing its former chest plate with both hands before it could descend any further, it arched back and promptly swung it down at the Angel's face.

"Crap," Hyouga cringed. "The Field's still holding."

Once again, the AT Field flared, the assaulter's attempts to push through it useless. Only this time, its creator's face glowed a hateful orange. And for the second time that day the helmeted golem was blasted away.

Not even a second passed after the powerhouse hit the ground, that the Angel started to fire its beam weapon in a horrendous frenzy. No quarter, no mercy, it fired and fired and fired where its enemy had crashed, it wasn't even going to take any chances as it had with the purple one. There would be nothing left after it was done, nothing but ashes. ASHES!! ASHES!!! ASHES!!!!! ASHES!!!!!!!! IT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE HERE!!!!! IT NEEDED TO BE GONE!!!!

Immeasurable violence and otherworldly brutality was nothing new to those watching the scene. To be perfectly frank, compared to that of the Fifth Angel's, Zeruel's projectile weapon was somewhat underwhelming. But whether they emerged from the sea or descended from space, the Angels always embodied a type of dignified grace as they razed buildings to the ground.

Fingers that had been rapidly typing on plastic keys paused. "I've never seen an Angel act so…so…wild before…" Maya attempted to whisper over the thunderous clamor the Angel of Might was creating.

Against popular belief, they seldom rampaged wantonly when they attacked. There had always been something exact and elegant in their sieges, a neat intelligence bellying their carnage. Imagine the shock on their enemies' faces at seeing one of these fluid titans completely lose its composure.

The violence of the barrage caused the GeoFront to tremble yet again. The tremors and convulsions even managed to jostle the prone form of the forgotten Unit 01, no doubt adding to its pilot's anxiety.

Unbeknownst to Shinji, Misato, Ritsuko, the bridge bunnies and even Zeruel, the ground was constantly rumbling even during the brief intervals between the Angel's bombardments. Careful observation, something no one present could give, would reveal that the seismic vibrations were moving, as if something was tunneling underground, burrowing and digging at extraordinary velocities through the artificial earth. Whether it discovered the secrets of NERV in its expedition would be investigated later. In Layman's terms, when the vermillion colossus burst out of the ground beneath Zeruel, no one felt it coming.

Upon its release, the ruby giant collided with the Angel, its speed being such that the Angel was unable to erect its AT Field in time. The force of the impact managed to actually topple Zeruel, and as another quake echoed through the sheltered forests surrounding them, the much smaller titan scrambled up the behemoth till it was practically straddling the glowing core of the 14th.

"**Le-s-Tr-er-."**

"What was that Maya?" Ritsuko asked tersely at who she thought was the owner of the broken voice.

"I-I didn't say anything Senpai!"

Not wasting a moment, lest the beast fire another volley, the mecha raised its damaged arms and two long drills emerged from both gauntlets. The four spirals whirled ferociously and perhaps sensing the danger, a thick shell shuttered over the red orb. Sparks flew as the quartet of steel was thrust at the Angel's membrane. Shards of red, black and yellow metal sprayed from the robot's shuddering back.

"**Cn-mst-rn!"**

"**Al-mst-er-br!"**

"Maya!"

"I told you it wasn't me!"

Rabid lightning ran through deteriorating joints. Every servo, every wire, every part if ut down to the smallest screw was involved in the act of penetrating the barrier that had survived mankind's most powerful armaments. Either it would break through, or it would simply break.

A grand shattering signaled it had achieved the former.

"**CHIKUSHOOOOO CHEEEEEESSSSST CHISSSSELERRRRRR!!!!!!!" **Someone deep voiced and fiery cried as the drills started to tear at the beast's torso. Someone who was clearly not with Misato and her peers.

"Maya!"

The accusation was gone from the doctor's voice and her admirer started to work. "It came from the laptop!" she exclaimed, opening several windows on the console. "A distress signal, it's been bouncing around the GeoFront for an outlet since," a few presses later and a small clock appeared in the center of the screen. "Since that thing crashed here."

What could best be described as guilty satisfaction flitted through Ritsuko's mind. "Least we know someone's piloting it, for a moment there I thought the EVAs were being outclassed by a mere AI." She said almost casually.

Her closest friend cast her a small look of disapproval. "I think it's safe to say that any rational computer wouldn't have tried to pull off half the things we've seen it do." Misato retorted. "And you should be glad that it's practically-."

CLANG!

She found her chastisment frozen at the tip of her tongue as the sight of the tattered war machine being flung into the air by Zeruel's restarted AT Field came into being. The vision was almost comical: a furious dynamo sent flying into the air by a creature that defying all sense reminded her of a toppled turtle. And she may have laughed if Zeruel hadn't chosen that moment to shoot the object of her amusement out of the sky.

"-saving our asses…" she finished.

The Sisyphean irony of the robot's failure was not lost on her though.

"**DAMNi-u-h-rrk!!!" **the unknown pilot gurgled over the laptop's small speakers.

"**ANIKI!!!!" **a much higher and more panicked voice followed.

The Major's eyes widened. _"No way," _she thought. "Maya, did that-?"

"Yes," the short-haired technician replied, equally bewildered at this development. "Not from the same part of the machine but, it's coming from inside, just like the other one."

"So there are two people inside that thing?" Perhaps it was because she was used to a single teenager piloting a machine roughly three times the size of the currently downed mech, but the idea that two people could execute all those daring attacks in perfect synch, was pretty farfetched.

Maya spied the many meters she had up. "Not only that, but they seem to be arguing."

"Patch us through." Misato ordered, seeing that the smoldering pile of metal was trying to get back on its feet again.

"Roger!"

With the fighting's temporary cessation, the GeoFront was oddly quiet save for the iron groans coming from the slow rising of the two-manned android, and so the following exchange came quite clearly.

"**L-looks like I really screwed up this time eh, Simon?"** the gruffer pilot wheezed

"**Aniki, you're hurt, we have to get away!"** the shrillness of this plea did little to hide its urgency, or sincerity for that matter.

Something wet plopped amidst the static lacing the lackadaisical answer. **"Put a little too much force into taking out that old ape…who knows how far we are from the others?" **The damaged robot lifted both its damaged faces to look at the downed, but very much alive, Zeruel. **"And this thing…whatever it is…it's tough…"**

His companion did not seem to share his dissonant tranquility. **"That's why we need to run damnit! Gurren Lagann's on it's last legs!!"**

"**Can't we do…that thing from back…?"**

"**I-I'm too sc-, I can't concentrate when you're like this, we need to get to safety, we need to run, RUN!"**

The response sent a pang of familiarity through the myriad of listeners. It was in the way the other pilot spoke, panicked, screamed, begged…all of it hit a little close to home, reminding them of the still helpless Third Child.

Deep bitter laughter followed. **"Oho, so I'm distracting you…"**

A small sound tried to refuse, but was unable to continue.

And everyone saw why.

Slowly, impossibly, the 14th Angel was getting up. Not by pressing its cruel hands into the ground or pulling itself to stand, it simply rose like some grotesque parody of Nosferatu from its earthen coffin, small streams of LCL bleeding from its core. There was no doubt in anyone's mind that it would finish in scant minutes, if not seconds. And then it would win.

"**Aniki…please, let's escape!"**

"**Like Hell I'll Retreat When One of Our Faces Still Works!!! What happened to that Simon who was so determined a few minutes ago?!"** taxed breathing, more wet things plopping in the background. **"All of this is just like before, even if we run we'll still be targets of this enormous skull-faced bastard. We need…you need…to win…" **the injured man must have pressed, pulled or whatever device was used to drive his vehicle as the now scared upper head tilted to the right, looking past its returning foe. **"That purple Gunman, yeah, it looks…about the right size to fight this sort of thing head on…even if it is missing an arm it's still in better shape than Gurren…"**

"**I don't even think that is a Gunman bro, it's got something weird on it's chest…"**

A soft crushing sound, the sight of steel ribbons swaying in the breeze, a face both impassive and merciless. Zeruel was back.

**(4)**

"**That does it, I've made my decision…"** onyx metal fingertips grasped what was left of the machine called Gurren Lagann's head. **"SIMON!!!! WHILE THE DOOR OF FATE IS OPEN AND ALL OUR ENEMY'S LIE IN OUR PATH, TAKE LAGANN AND GO GET THAT BIG GUY-!!!!"** There was a great ripping of steel from steel, and the head was torn free, now with a large drill sprouting from its bottom, and grasped firmly in the torso's rapidly decaying palm. More and more chunks of metal began to fall off, as if the head was the pin holding all the disparate parts together. But through all the falling of its sharp teeth, the crumpling of its shoulders, what could pass as a smile was plastered on its giant features. The hand holding the former head shot back-. **"-fired…up…"** -and flung it with tremendous might that no body in its state had a right to posses.

Zeruel's sent one of its stainless, sharp sheets to sate its hunger for crimson. The arm lunged at the thrown head's flight path, aiming to slay both faces in one clean slice.

A scream, familiar and desperate, chased the panic out of the second pilot's next transmission. **"DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT HURTING MY BROTHER!!!!" **The drill on the projectile cranium's base whirled at speeds much fiercer than those used in the Gurren Lagann's failed sneak attack.

The strip of deadly EVA-cutting blade met the tiny auger. Both tools struggled briefly against each other, until the drill broke through, slicing and twisting the once perfect slab into an immense mass of tangled confetti, before neatly smashing past the bony shoulder that formerly housed it.

"…**nice…"** Misato would have heard the first pilot sputter, if she and the others hadn't been watching the scene that had unfolded and was unfolding before them.

After shooting past the beast and relieving it of one of its appendages in the process, 'Lagann' sped through the air, drill still spinning, directly at the sleeping Unit 01.

The young Major briefly wondered why it wasn't slowing down or turning back. Should it continue, a crash would have been immensely inevitable. Thus in a flash of horror and incredulity did she realize what 'fired up' was about to mean. "No way!"

Not that the epiphany would have stopped any of this. Unit-01's head snapped back as the Lagann finally hit its mark, the shrill of its charge finally silenced as it firmly lodged itself atop the purple Eva's visage.

The men and women of NERV naturally cringed, and then waited. Waited for Shinji to scream in pain over the radio, for the lanky android to right itself in rage, for something. A few tense breaths later…absolutely nothing was happening. They silently cursed themselves, a brief part of them actually thought that the collision would somehow rouse the violet warrior, get it fired up as it were. And in mere moments Zeruel would turn around to avenge its lost limb and finish what it had started with Shinji. Feelings of optimism began to sink into the familiar emotional quagmire, to be consumed and transformed into ones more appropriate to the situation, like defeat.

Then as those flames of joy flickered, a new light came into being atop the Lagann's head. A small band of green energy looped over the two haphazardly combined mechas. Barely a second after another larger ring appeared below that one, and one after that, and another after that.

Hyouga spoke first. "What's happening?"

A nearby gasp indicated that someone close knew. "The green energy from before, it's back!" Maya gasped.

"And it's forming…a makeshift AT Field?" her senpai observed.

By now dozens of these rings had telescopically formed around the downed EVA, each one larger and further from the top than the last, like dozens of jade halos. When the last one was appeared, barely hovering off the ground, the bands began to spin.

Violent winds were something unheard of in the GeoFront, the place demanded precise conditions for optimal growth. Nevertheless, gales did come to the underground sanctuary; and by an upside down tornado of all things. The air slipped and billowed, practically becoming a solid object as the flying trees, dirt, and water were strewn about and caught by it. If Misato and the others hadn't been as far as they were they would've been snatched away by the unnatural twister. A vortex that Shinji and the other pilot were either concealed or trapped in.

Streaks of hateful energy pounced out of Zeruel's jaws, but the moment they came into contact with the swirling storm they ricocheted off of it and into the walls of the GeoFront.

The spiral hurricane started to shrink, becoming more compressed and aggressive. Until with an earth shattering crack, it burst apart.

Misato coughed. The explosion had kicked up an immense quantitity of dust. Hands claseped over her ears to ease the ringing in them, she tried to see through this dirt-made fog. To her ire, all she could see were her fellow NERV staff, and the amputee Angel, apparently as confused as she was. _"What happened to Shinji damnit? He was right in the middle of that twister!"_

Tired of waiting for the dust to settle, if it could indeed feel fatigue, Zeruel unfolded its remaining blade. The arm tilted left or right, as if deciding where its crippled opponent was. It stopped, darted into the unknown, and was promptly ripped off of Zeruel's body.

Blood as red as the being it had attacked now flowed from both its sides and down its chest.

"Did we win?" Aoba dared, the Angel didn't have anything left to fight with.

A glint of incredible rage flashed in Zeruel's hollow sockets and the horror's body began to tremble.

"No, it's going to self destruct!" Misato shrieked, knowing full well how destructive a kamikaze Angel could be, Shinji barely survived in his EVA, and here they were all exposed! _"Sore loser!!!"_ she couldn't help but think.

Zeruel was indeed on the verge of blowing itself up. In this way, it would destroy the anomaly and the humans guarding its goal. His successors would have an infinitely easier time reaching it.

Nothing could stop it now, nothing except that large pointed object that was roaring in from dust cloud.

_DRILL_

To all observing, a humongous gyrating drill had emerged from the smoke and completely annihilated what was left of Zeruel. The attack had been so quick that it was only when a drop of inhuman blood fell on her head did Misato realize that the 14th Angel was no more.

Fear abruptly gripped her. Attached to the drill, still concealed in the mantle of soot, was an equally humongous shadow. The thing was about as tall as Unit 01, but it was different all the same. Intense golden eyes, shone through and looked at her. Seeing it there, looking down at them all, a creature not known to any of them, brought bitter reminisces of Antartica: the glowing abomination that had changed the world forever, and those of Tokyo, when Shinji emerged from the immense fireball created by his first battle with the former being's offspring. Recollections of trepidation, awe in the sublime, were stirring within her.

Without warning, the drill retreated back into the cover of the obscuring particles and a huge crimson hand reached out to scoop up the remains of what Misato and the others guessed was Gurren. The shadow's arm returned to the ash-colored fog and raised its other limb. The roar returned and the silhouette flew upwards, the smoke around it swirling into the shape of a spiral.

There were three gaping holes in the GeoFront's shields now.

And Unit 01, was missing.

**(Elsewhere)**

"This was certainly unexpected,"

_Grin._

"I suppose observation would be appropriate at this point in time, yes?"

_Nod._

"Very well, I shall, spread the good word while I'm at it."

_Go._

"I look forward to meeting you…"

To be continued

**(Misato) Preview:** Some pretty drastic changes happen over a three week time-skip. Dimensional vagabonds learn the value of hard work and clean floors. Faith is tested in the bowels of an asylum and in the lushness of office chairs. Shinji has a chance encounter… Next on Neon Toppa EVA Lagann: SCRUBBING A STORY: oral stage or "Get On Your Feet!!!"

**Author Note:** Yes, I did that. You didn't really think I'd reveal the titular mecha in all its glory in the very first chapter of the story, did you? Where would the suspense be in that? Oh, and how did a biological entitiy such as Unit 01 combine with the mechanical Lagann? You'll find that out later.

But first, a little contest. I'd like to invite all those that read this fic (and made it this far), to send me their interpretations of what Eva Lagann looks like, winners will receive a one-shot of their choice, and some previews of upcoming chapters and projects beyond this. Contestant minimum at 20, so be sure to spread the word! Winners announced at August 10!

Just post them on the internet some place and send me the link via private message.

1st prize: 1-shot with subject of choice, OMAKE of choice, advance Eva Lagann soundtrack cover and list, several 'theatrical posters'.

2nd prize: OMAKE of choice, Advanced Eva Lagann soundtrack cover and song list, several theatrical posters.

3rd prize: Choice images.

Oh and have you heard about how Rebuild 2.0 went, I heard it was incredibly awesome, and wished I had submitted this fic earlier so it wouldn't have to measure up!!!!

Read and Review!!!!


	2. SCRUBBING A STORY: oral stage

Disclaimer: Still don't own either franchise, I also don't own any of the recommended songs.

Author Note: Pretty Good Reception for the Pilot Episode, I think I'll press on in fact. Oh, to all those interested in the contest, keep up with the great ideas, though I'd much like to see illustrated forms of your ideas rather than descriptions. Though I have some replies to your reviews.

Starburst98: Now don't panic, Shinji and the exiled remains of the Gurren Brigade will meet, just not in the way you expect; and about the idea that Kamina will teach Shinji how to be manly, my plan is similar, but has a twist I think you'll find amusing.

Justanotherguyathiscomputer: Yeah, didn't see that plot twist coming either…

Paladin13: Love the color scheme you came up with.

Oh, and in true Gainax fashion, this particular chapter is the mandatory fanservice one, just not the kind you'd expect. Now on with the show

Soundtrack Listing:

**(1)** Someone's Cursing Someone Else by Iwasaki Taku

**(2) **Cruel Dilemme III by Sagisu Shirou

**(3) **Is a Mole Just a Mole? By Iwasaki Taku

**(4)**Rap is the Soul of a Man! Perk Up Your Earholes and Listen REAL Close to the Theme of Lord Kamina, the Man of Raging Billows Who Believes in Himself and Points to Heaven!! By Iwasaki Taku

**(5)** Hostility Restrained by Sagisu Shirou

**(6)** Do Mole-Pigs Dream about Spirals? By Iwasaki Taku

**Episode 2: ****SCRUBBING A STORY: oral stage or "Get On Your Feet!!!"**

_"Was Man and Woman cast out of the Eden for disobedience, or ineptitude?"_

**(Three weeks later…)**

**(Somewhere)**

**(1)**

Wake up…

The man groaned as he was roused from whatever state he was previously. He wouldn't have called it slumber, no he was far too aware to be asleep. It was more like, he had been awake with his eyes closed. His limited knowledge would not be able to place the sensation, but he had felt his consciousness dip and rise erratically behind his closed lids; almost as if there were distractions preventing him from napping.

"_**What? Who's there?"**_ a redundant question; the voice was familiar to him, he recalled it's whispers concealed by silence in his former cavern of a home. It had always been there…but it never had a name. _**"Tou-san?"**_ he tried.

Would you like it to be?

He smirked weakly. It was a foolish idea from the start, that man had only been with him briefly. This was something far more constant, like a shadow or set of footprints, never far behind, no matter the distance he went. _**"No, not unless it's the real thing…"**_

How are you here?

"_**Travelled."**_ He said curtly.

What do you recall?

"_**Fighting…"**_

Who?

"_**The Beastmen, that huge skull thing."**_

A skull is a universal symbol of Death.

Though it probably wasn't an insult, he still took issue with that statement. His skull was different; his skull was on fire and was wearing a pair of the greatest sunglasses of all time (his design of course). It didn't represent death, it represented…well he wasn't quite sure what it represented, but not death. Death meant defeat, and he was certain he wasn't advertising that on his banner. _**"Not on my flag it doesn't!"**_

What does that represent?

He thought about it for a moment, what did he make it for? Revolution? Freedom? Manliness?

Ego…

Ouch. _**"Hey!"**_

Did you see death in that fight?

The answer almost didn't let the question finish_. __**"No!"**_ that creature was grotesque, and it had nearly (or had it?) killed him, but he did not see death in its twisted visage. He had seen death long before that: unceremoniously cast on the desert rock, mere yards from civilization, draped in red. Red he now wore on his back in legacy.

Why did you take it?

"What, Gurren?" Where the hell were these questions coming from.

Why did you take it?

There was no way he was telling it that. _**"It's a stupid reason, you don't want to hear it."**_

Are you afraid?

"_**No."**_

Are you alone?

"_**No."**_

Alone

"_**I'm not…"**_

Alone

"_**I said I'm not!"**_

From the very start…

"_**I have my bro, you bodiless creep!"**_

Do you want the loneliness to stop?

"_**What?!"**_

Then when the time comes, and you exceed expectations, open you arms…

"_**Look, if you think I'm just going to sit here and…and…"**_Something was prying his eyes open, he could feel the air blow dust onto their moist surfaces. His stomach gurgled, his lungs expanded, and his head hurt like hell. For the first time since he had been in this trance, he was feeling.

And embrace…

He didn't have long, he was being pulled away, or forced away from wherever was. But he managed to utter one last question. _**"Who?"**_

Something syrupy and dark tinged the familiar voice's final reply.

Everyone…

Softness greeted his back and the morning light screamed into his eyes as he truly finaly awakened.

The man quickly blinked to banish some of those invading rays away. He tried to lift a hand to help block them out, but found it ached to do so. His face scrunched up in effort, slowly allowing the light through to become better aquainted with it. If he got used to it, he could open his eyes, he could see.

Something came into focus, a ceiling, ordinary, plain, not one he was familiar with though. He looked to his left and saw there were beds, some hidden by a veil, others possessed people in varying states of injury, all unconscious. Injury was also something he wasn't a stranger too, although the room was cleaner.

He looked to his right, half-expecting to see Simon sitting beside him and was left breathless. What greeted him was a vision obscured by buildings, tall, huge, to the point they stretched out of the window's vision. And below that, vehicles very much like mining carts, but covered in metal and without rails sped along a perfect black road, while people bustled nearby, moving place to place in groups larger than he had ever seen before. The sun seemed to be captured in every pane of glass on every skyscraper.

Countless questions could've been asked: What is this? Where am I? But what passed out of his lips was not inquiry, but wonder.

"Wow."

Suddenly, Kamina didn't feel so tired anymore.

**(NERV HQ)**

**(2)**

In what one could very well say was a natural defense mechanism, the citizens of Tokyo-3 never really tried to think about what went on in NERV HQ. As long as the organization did their job and protected them from the Angels, they didn't pay them any mind. Because to ponder for even a moment of what complex happenings occurred in the depths of that guarded facility was only inviting irritation and befuddlement to one's mind. Who knows what happens down there, they could be constructing even more of those atrocious EVAs, experimenting on compounds so deadly a teaspoon of them could wipe out the city, or maybe they were monitoring everyone's activities via some gigantic surveillance system.

Oddly, no one really gave any thought to the idea of two people having a casual conversation in a small bar, drinking the same unhealthy alcoholic beverages that everyone else did. The key difference being that the subject of the casual conversation were giant robots.

Misato lightly twirled the glass in her hands, very glad that the liquor was there to stir the ice, and eventually go down her throat. "Thank God, I've been needing one of these for a while."

"You've been gone for only a few days." Ritsuko countered.

"A week actually," Her dark haired companion waited for the small sound of burnt tobacco smoldering in an ashtray before speaking again. "Going there just really threw me off Rits, and I'm not just talking about how my flights kept getting delayed."

The blonde took a sip from her own glass. "Did you learn anything new?"

Misato paused. It was strangely difficult to recall the meeting, by all means it should have been a fresh memory as it was so recent…

From what the MAGI had predicted, based on trajectory and the velocities required to break through the GeoFront's shields, that the "Gurren Lagann" or whatever its pilots called it, had emerged from what was left of NERV's Nevada branch.

The Dirac Sea created from Unit 04's meltdown had been under study, though the phenomenon itself was gone. The outpost there was monitoring the area as it always did, with little hope of discerning anything new, when that thing practically burst out of the ground, warping the ruins in a great paradoxical splash.

When the recovery teams arrived in the outpost, all three inhabitants were in different states of duress: one was dead, one was missing, and one was crazy.

No one had actually seen the machine come out of the area, all surveillance equipment had been fried upon its entry. It was a long shot, but NERV insisted that an account of the Gurren Lagann's origin would provide some insight on what it was and where it came from. And seeing as how Misato had seen it first hand, it was reasonable to believe she could help put the pieces together. That was a week ago.

So Misato went to the only primary eye-witness NERV had on hand, the crazy one.

Unfortunately, it took a full two weeks for the American medical staff to deem the survivor to be fit for conversation, much less a formal inquiry.

"Nothing we already didn't know," she waved. "Freaky, spinning object immolated in a strange energy we've never seen before." The glass of whisky weighed a bit lighter in her hand. "Waste of time if you ask me…"

"So you didn't speak with him before he…" Ritsuko paused.

"He was long dead by the time I got there…" her friend chimed. Neither of them enjoyed talking about suicide, not that they weren't used to it, with one of their mother's having done it and the other caring for a child whose mother had also taken her own life. Still, it was a touchy subject. "I didn't know whether to feel sad or irritated. After all the delays, the red tape, having to ride coach, I walked into that asylum with all the intent of milking out every drop of information out of the loon." The Major repressed a smile, ordinarily being in such a stark and dingy house of madness would've made her nervous and tentative, but she had been too pissed to even consider being wary. "And right there, standing at the lobby is some NERV officer telling me the man had killed himself a few hours before I arrived." She gulped down another mouthful of alcohol. "And that he was sorry for the inconvenience."

How easy it would've been to assume that was what was bothering her friend. But Ritsuko was a scientist, and such people were generally more thorough in seeking answers. "That doesn't seem to be grounds for drinking at this time of day, the two of us should be working." The blonde pulled the sides of her labcoat down in a vain attempt to straighten them. "I feel a bit silly for wearing this here too."

Misato sighed. "Yeah, well before he died, he left something behind." Refill. "Well a lot of things behind." She lifted a thick manila envelope up for Ritsuko to see. "When he was calmed down, he tended to draw…pictures…real amateurish stuff, barely above kindergarten level." Her fingers let the thing drop from them. "The agent wanted me to have them. Of course I didn't want them; they were pictures a crazy guy made. They probably had crashed cars, burning people and hotdogs shooting laser beams out of their tips." Misato ignored the odd look the Doctor was giving her. "But he insisted. He said that his branch had looked them over carefully and had discovered, 'subjects which your superiors would find intriguing.' Though he claimed he didn't know why." She took another swig. "I was too tired to argue so I took the packet and on the flight back here. Most of the stuff didn't make any sense but…well see for yourself."

Casting a small look of distaste at the Major, Ritsuko opened the envelope and gingerly took out its contents. She found that Misato was quite right, they were very childish, and didn't make any sense. One illustration had a sky full of eyes, looking down at a group of poorly rendered people, another had a boy (or girl? He really was a lousy artist) made out of roughly shaped squares. And there were pages and pages of planar curves inked in green, revolving around their points till they ran off the page. "This is complete nonsense."

"Keep looking…"

So she did, if anything to humor her friend. More abstract nonsense, and then, she saw what Misato had seen. It was a black lanky figure with spindly arms and legs and pointed shoulders, towering what was probably a city. Even this badly drawn, it was clearly and EVA, and those red things on its back, deformed looking as they were, were clearly wings. "What…rank was he?"

Misato smiled, considering this a subtle victory over the skeptical doctor. "He was just some low level employee, I think he made the coffee at the outpost…" she set the glass down for the first time they had started talking. "Which begs the question, how did he find out what our EVAs are really made of?"

The blonde swallowed slightly. "It might just be a coincidence, surely the idea that the EVAs are connected more intimately with the Angels they fight is not an uncommon one." She tensed a bit. "I can see why the Americans thought this would concern us, this information, even in this form, coming from NERV, could spark a great deal of inquiry from the public."

"Who knows what they'll do if they realize that what's protecting them is made from the enemy, right?" she hadn't taken that revelation particularly well when she oversaw the repairs of Unit 01, and thus knew the rest of the world wouldn't either. "He who fights monster, and all that…"

"Yes…" she answered, flipping to the next page and frowning again. "I thought you said no one there knew how the machine looked like." Another drawing, this time of a boxy machine with two faces, with a large cone for one arm, and a jagged shape clenched in its other. "And we suppressed the images from the surveillance equipment."

"The mystery deepens…" Misato picked the glass up again. "But he was crazy, so maybe he became a conspiracy nut near the end." The sloshing of drink against glass filled the intense silence, the music not being on this time of day. "Why did you tell me?"

Ritsuko briefly looked at an image of several crude Sahaquiels lined up in a row on a conveyor belt. "Thought you deserved to know." She left out the part that the secret had been eating at her for years and Misato had been a convenient outlet. "And besides, didn't you ever wonde-?" a sharp ring interrupted her excuse. Her phone was taken out of her pocket and flipped open. "Yes?" she asked upon placing it next to her ear. "Yes, everything looks stable, it went by without a hitch…Thank you." With that she closed her phone and took a drink of her now cold coffee.

"Do I deserve to know what you just talked about?"

"I'm afraid not Misato."

The Major had to laugh at that. "So let me ask you a question, I know that you can answer, Rits."

"And that would be?" 'Rits' aked.

"What do you think those 'other' pilots are doing now?"

Despite herself, Ritsuko drank deeply from what was left in her mug, the cold bitterness oddly refreshing her senses, and gently fought back the fact that even with all of NERV's manpower, the 'Gurren Lagann' and its pilots, could not be found. "Probably up to all kinds of mischief."

**(Tokyo-3 Memorial Hospital)**

**(3)**

Simon didn't know the word for what had been spilled on the hallway floor. It smelled foul and made sides of his nostrils stretch in revulsion, but it wasn't blood, he knew all about blood. He hated cleaning up blood the worst. That and urine, he hated cleaning that up too.

It was something clear and bubbling, and he decided he liked this mess. Clear messes were a boon to him, a few slides of the mop and the majority of it would cling onto the many thick strings, and the rest of it would be too widely spread to be noticeable and too dry to slip on.

Blood was different, it was the color he decided…it always stained. Try to spread it out, and it becomes even more pronounced, and only a bit thinner. Plasma was always sticky and what was put in his mop always turned the water in his bucket red. As it smelt and looked like it, the queasy idea he was carrying a bucket of blood never left his mind. Which was ironic, he did ride around in a giant robot colored that way. Though that had been a while ago.

He had gotten what he thought was the last of the liquid, and made to leave to get to other areas that required tidying, when he noticed a stubborn piece of filth had stuck to the floor. Making sure that he wouldn't be in anybody's way, he took a small brush out of his belt and applied some soap on its bristles.

"Stubborn…" Simon mused as he got on his knees to better reach the dirt. "Just like bro…just like that memory…"

**(3 weeks ago)**

**(outskirts of Tokyo-3)**

"**WHERE IS IT????!!!!"** Simon screamed, pushing the brown-haired boy against the bizarre, purple Gunman. **"TELL ME!!!!"**

He had pulled the boy out of a large white cylinder that had ejected from the machine after they had crashed here. "I-I don't understand!" And he wasn't cooperating. "Who-who are you?"

Simon grit his teeth, casting a glance back at the open cockpit of the shattered Gurren. Kamina's condition was worse than he had imagined and he quickly understood why he refused to open the video feed between their Gunmen. There was the hole, which stood out most of all, a fist sized orifice that went straight through him. The awkward position of his body indicated that some of his bones were broken. Pints of blood were splattered around his cockpit. And even as Boota licked his face in vain, he wasn't moving…

The young founder of the Gurren Brigade shoved his old tunnel drill into the boy's stomach, causing the unknown pilot to gasp in pain. "Who am I? I'll tell you who I am. I'm Simon, a member of the Gurren Brigade, but more importantly I happen to be the best driller in Jiiha Village." He shifted slightly, with one hand pressed against the boy and the other on the handle of the massive tool. "I hold the record for cleanest penetration (don't you dare laugh!), most feet of earth excavated in a single day, and best of all, fastest tunneling through granite and diamond." The drill was given slightly more force to make Simon's threat clear. **"WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?!"**

"Please, I didn't even know what you're talking about!" the boy whimpered. "Just-just let me go…"

"You want me to bore a hole in you or not?!" Simon threatened. This guy was beginning to get on his nerves: all that sniveling, whining, and spinelessness. It was all so damn annoying…and all too familiar. How the hell did Kamina put up with this kind of behavior from him for so long? He decided to put that thought aside for the moment, his brother was dying, and nothing else mattered. "I'll ask you again, slowly…but you better answer fast! **WHERE-CAN-I-FIND-A-DOCTOR****..???!!! AND IT BETTER BE CLOSE OR-!"**

**(PRESENT)**

Simon wiped his eyes at the memory, as if he had been the one with a drill against his stomach and not the hapless youth from weeks ago.

"_That wasn't fair…I could have asked him nicely…"_

The boy had told him of course, sobbing all the while. Simon and Boota left him where he was, curled up next to the violet robot.

After quickly stashing Gurren into an open cave, Simon drove Lagann to the building marked with the giant red cross, Kamina's still bleeding body slouched against him. Even he was amazed at the speed he had worked at, digging under most of the earth beneath the closed doors with his tiny Gunman, before going out the final few feet with his own drill, carrying his friend on his shoulders all the while. As he screramed and begged in that empty lobby much like the unknown pilot had moments earlier with Kamina in his arms, a nurse that had stayed behind with one of her bedridden patients took notice. Luck was on his side as most of the medical staff had evacuated to the shelters during the 'Angel' attack. She called a surgeon using a handheld communication device and told him "-to get your craven ass out of that glorified foxhole because there were still people outside of it that needed medical attention."…or something like that.

Though there was a lot to be thankful for in Simon's life, he was nevertheless quite a negative individual and could never truly muster half the confidence or optimism that seemed to ooze out of his surrogate brother. Imagine his surprise when he actually allowed himself to feel glad that they managed to 'stabilize' him. Though they tried quashing it with reluctantly delivered warnings that he may never wake up, Simon remained upbeat. Surely his brother could beat a 'coma' no matter what the doctors had said.

Meanwhile he had applied for a job at the hospital. The young driller had been discouraged at first, and those running the building initially refused, but buckled down after more and more of the hospital staff left town in fear of future attacks. So he was given a few tools, the mop, the bucket, the brush in his hand, and the occasional floor buffer, to maintain a bit of cleanliness in the busy and ironically understaffed hospital. Thanks were exchanged, both genuine: Simon for being allowed to help out and not be useless, and the Head Doctor for the fact that the lad was actually taking steps to repay the debt his unconscious companion was racking up in the coma ward.

The adjustment to his life in the hospital came fairly easy. During the mornings and afternoons he would clean the floors and scrub the windows. And in the evenings, he'd go to the coma ward and fall asleep by Kamina's bedside. Here, he found a near comfortable uniformity he had not experienced since Yoko, Gunmen, Beastmen, Guns, and Bathhouses came into his life.

Another thing he liked about his job was that it didn't require a lot of reading, though upon seeing how clueless he was at deciphering kanji, some of the nurses were kind enough to teach him how to read basic characters. On some occasions, during his breaks, he even went outside the building to walk around as much of the city as he wished, which often wasn't a lot.

This city was called Tokyo-3, a huge human settlement aboveground. Simon had never seen so many people in a single place. There were probably more humans in this hospital than there had been in his whole village! Despite his having ample time to do so, he hadn't ventured very far into the metropolis, fearing what would happen if he left the place that held his friend. Not to say that he wasn't fascinated by it: the cars, the skyscrapers, the streets, the lights that stayed on even as the moon hung overhead, the food, and the cola…when he woke up Kamina just had to try the cola!

"_Speaking of bro, in a week he'll have been asleep for a whole month."_ Simon thought. _"Maybe I should get him something to celebrate…"_ he wondered before bopping himself in the head. _"No, that would be stupid, why would I make an anniversary for something as terrible as being unable to wake up?"_

He continued to scrub the floors, still debating on whether or not to get his brother a cake for the 'anniversary' when a slipper-clad foot blocked his path. Attempts were made to get around it, and each time it stubbornly got in the way of his brush.

"Excuse me sir-." Simon looked up, intending to chastise the person who was getting in his way, and froze.

**(4)**

"Sir? Simon, how many times do I have to tell you, call me Aniki!" Kamina bellowed. **"NOW GET ON YOUR FEET!!"**

Simon did much more than that: he leapt.

"**ANIKI!!!"**

The still sore Demon Leader of the Gurren Brigade found himself on his back once again, this time with the trembling, crying form of Simon on top of him.

"**BRO, YOU'RE AWAKE, YOU'RE AWAKE!!!!!"** Simon yelled in glee. **"I TOLD THEM YOU WOULD, I TOLD THEM YOU'D GET OUT OF IT!!!!" **This was why Simon had never let himself get too far from the hospital. He might have missed this, and there was no way he'd miss this. His leader, his friend, his brother, back from Limbo, and among the living, it was almost too good to be true. **"WHEN I GOT YOU OUT OF GURREN, YOU WERE SO…SO…I**…I thought you were done for…" The laughter turned back into tears once more. "I don't know what I would have…I…"

Kamina's eyes widened, partially out of the pain coming from his back and sides, but mostly at what Simon had said. How long had he been asleep? _"That creepy talk with that faceless bastard probably took longer than I thought!" _Thoughts of revenge were quickly doused by the sobs of the boy who had tackled him. "It's alright Simon, I'm fine, see?" he patted the head of the youth reassuringly. "I'm not going to pass on anytime soon."

Simon sniffed. "R-really?" he asked, wiping some of the tears from his eyes.

"Of course, not till the world ends at least…Now get the hell off me, people are staring!" People of course, were staring. Some of them found the scene heartwarming, most however were wondering what the hell was going on.

"S-sorry!" Simon quickly scrambled off of Kamina's aching form.

"You better hope none of the nurses saw that!" Kamina groaned slightly as he stood up. "Haven't had a chance to introduce myself…Don't want to give them the wrong idea." He said casually.

The young driller's face reddened. "I-It was nothing like that!"

"Damn straight it wasn't." Kamina shot back, looking down at his clothes in distaste. "And where are my pants?"

Suddenly, Simon realized that Kamina was still in his hospital gown. "Well you see, it made it easier for the nurses to uh…" this was still embarrassing no matter how many times he thought about it. "…clean you when you were…dirty…"

The look of mild annoyance on Kamina's face from not having any pants changed to one of shock. "You-you don't mean-?!" he couldn't finish, the mere idea was terrifying. If anyone in the Brigade found out about it, he'd never live it down. "I-I didn't-?!"

His blood brother scratched the back of his head, as if hoping to find the right words there. "Well you were asleep for a long time…so it's only natural that you'd need to use the bathro-."

"Don't say another word!" he ordered, the less said about it the better. "Urr…Anyway, have you taken a look outside? It's incredible: An entire city above ground bustling with tons of people! And those buildings, I've never seen buildings that high. It's all so…" Kamina's voice trailed off as he looked out an open window, a light breeze ruffling his hair. "This isn't our world, is it Simon?"

Simon nodded, though he was surprised that his bro had picked up on that so quickly. It was just another testament to the fact that despite his reckless disposition, he was actually quite clever. "No, I don't think it is…"

Instead of an intense silence, or a deep sigh, what followed was Kamina grabbing Simon by the collar and shaking him. "Then what are standing around here for?" he demanded, shaking Simon harder. "Don't you realize what an opportunity this is? Don't you realize what this city is?" with no answer coming from the dizzy Simon forthcoming, he pressed on. "It's a blueprint for a society above the ground! You don't know how many hours I've been kept awake by wondering what life would be like if we moved the villages to the surface, and now here we are in such a village. You know what we need to do right?" the now dizzy Simon shook his head at one of the three Kaminas in his vision. "We need to get out there and find out all we can about this world, discover what they have, what they did, and then use that information to make our own huge buildings and roads when we get back home!"

"I-I-I-I-I-N-N-N-NEV-V-V-E-R-R-R-TH-TH-OUGHT-T-T-T-A-A-B-BOUT-IT-T-TH-THAT-W-WAY!" Simon managed to sputter out as the shaking continued.

"How could you not see what fate has brought us here to do?" Kamina berated, and finally released his friend. "Now let's not delay, there's a world out there to explore!"

He stepped boldly toward the door, intending to face his destiny with nothing more than the slippers on his feet and the gown on his back.

"**HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!" **someone yelled from behind the duo.

Kamina turned around to face what he would have sworn to be a short Beastman: a Raccoon Woman to be exact. The dark rings under her sharp eyes, her large stout frame, the small hands attached to great-ham like arms. She was clearly human though, she didn't have a bushy tail. "Where do you think you're going?"

Blinking slightly at this unwelcome interruption, Kamina crossed his arms and said. "Outside into the immense unknown to take back with me the knowledge of a human metropolis to my battle-scared home, like water to a desert's parched throat." He smirked, that had sounded pretty good for something he just thought up.

"You're not going into the immense anywhere 'till you pay your dues!" the nurse retorted.

"What was that you big raccoon?!"

Clearly unthreatened by Kamina's larger height, the nurse lifted a clenched fist to his face. "Is that any way to express gratitude to the woman that's been dealing with your crap for the last three weeks?"

Recognizing the nurse, Simon intervened, seeing the familiar signs of a potential brawl coming into existence"Koshi-san, please excuse him! He just got out of his coma!"

"And he'll be in another one, if he doesn't haul his tattooed ass back into bed! He needs his rest" Koshi shot back, then shook here knuckles at the blue-haired man's chin. "Or if I lose my temper."

The threatened youth eyed the fist incredulously, "What kind of nurse hurts her patients?"

"How the hell are you even standing?" the nurse probed. "You shouldn't even be able to move your big toe with how long you've been out!"

"Fighting spirit." He calmly answered.

Simon was at a loss, this could go on forever. He knew that Nurse Koshi was not a woman to take lightly, and would never back down from anything. In fact, she had been the one who had stayed behind in the hospital and help save Kamina. When he asked her why she didn't hide with the others, she said that after surviving something called Second Impact, she wasn't afraid of anything; and then berated him for being ignorant of the event.

Fortunately, someone had taken notice of the ruckus and politely stepped into the shouting match. "Is there a problem here?"

Nurse Koshi was quick to put him up to speed. "Doctor Hizume! This man just woke up from his three-week coma and refuses to rest!"

The doctor's eyes gave Kamina a quick once-over. "And he's on his feet? Remarkable."

Koshi groaned, somewhat expecting this. "He also refuses to pay his bill."

"Well we can't have that." Doctor Hizume sighed, amazement turning into dissapointment. "You must understand sir that with the economy as it is now, every yen helps. And you have been racking up quite the sum since we took you in."

This made Simon look to Kamina hopefully, perhaps Doctor Hizume's explanation had made things clear…

"What's an economy?" Kamina asked innocently.

…So much for that.

Koshi and Hizume's palms lightly smacked their faces in frustration. _"Yet another ignorant illiterate to deal with…" _As pleasant as Simon was, working with someone who seemed completely oblivious to everyday concepts and even basic kanji, was a taxing chore. And his 'brother' was looking to be just as thickheaded, if not moreso. "Your brother here," Hizume pointed to Simon. "Has been actively working for us to help pay your bills, scrubbing the floors and such. However, despite his efforts, a large amount of those payments still haven't been made. Not for a lack of trying though." He quickly added upon seeing the downcast look on Simon's face.

Ever so subtly, Kamina's iron stance softened. _"So that's why Simon was cooped up in here…"_ Now he felt a bit embarrassed for practically threatening his surrogate sibling. _"Scrubbing floors, when he could be adventuring."_ He scratched the back of his head in annoyance, mostly aimed at himself. _"And what have I been doing this whole time, taking a nap?"_ That wouldn't do he decided, he needed to start pulling his weight around from now on! "Hrr…okay, okay I'm sorry, as the leader of the Dai-Gurren Brigade, I can't go back on any debt I owe to someone." His arms crossed once more. "It would set a bad example to my underlings after all. So I guess I could help clean up around here…"

Not having the foggiest idea what the tattooed youth was talking about, Doctor Hizume decided it was best to just accept the man's offer. "Good, seeing as you like Simon have no money on you, you can proceed with the lobby I suppose, work your way up, and dispose of the garbage bags at the end of the day."

"Where does this guy get off giving us so much work?" the newly inducted custodian mentally seethed. "Fine, fine…so, how long are we going to be doing this?" It better have been a week at most, no telling what was happening to Yoko and the others now…

The situation apparently resolved, Doctor Hizume made to walk away and attend to other matters. "Oh you should be done in several months."

"Sure, sure, alright Simon first things first, let's get me some pa-." Kamina began before realizing how long that actually was**. "-AAAAAAAAAAA-SEVERAL MONTHS?!!! NO WAY, I DON'T BELIEVE YOU! SOMEONE HAND ME THE BILL, I WANT TO SEE IT!!!!"** His head darted left and right among the three people present then stopped at Simon, whose outstretched hand held a crumpled piece of paper. "Thanks…" he looked at the leaflet with an unmistakable intensity…then turned it upside down.

"You can't read either, can you?" the stout nurse asked ironically.

Meanwhile, Simon was nervously chewing his lower lip. What could they do? These people had taken care of the two of them for weeks and it would be wrong not to repay them in some way. And yet, they needed to find a way home, though they were capable of taking care of themselves, the rest of the Dai-Gurren Brigade could be in serious trouble. He hadn't thought about them much in the last three weeks, everytime he did he felt a guilty pain in his heart.

What he should've been asking himself was what Kamina was going to do, because if he did, he might've gained an inkling of what his aniki was planning. Well, chances missed.

A quick tearing of the bill heralded the end of the mental détente. "I've got it!" Kamina bellowed, clenching both his hands in delight and then raising one to Hizume's back. "Old man-!"

"I'm only 36!" Hizume corrected. Age seemed to be an issue with him.

Kamina adjusted his declaration, if only slightly. "-36 year old man! I challenge you to challenge us with an enormous task to win us our freedom!"

The decidedly not old doctor turned to Kamina, clipboard tucked under his arm. "What kind of task Mr. Kamina?"

'Mr.' Kamina grinned. "A cleaning challenge! You insult the two of us by thinking that we require days, weeks, and indeed months to exorcise this place of all its impurities. Well if you aren't afraid to put your 'yen' on the table and roll some bones then we'll have this place completely spotless in a SINGLE hour and in return you have to let us both go!" he pointed at himself with his thumb, the look on his face indicating he clearly believed that he and Simon could complete such an absurd trial. And for a moment, Simon felt confident and safe, just as he did whenever Kamina made one of these speeches. "And if we lose, you can triple our debt."

That rendered Simon unsure and endangered yet again, as he did whenever Kamina finished his speeches. "A-a-Aniki! Don't promise such risky things!" Failure meant making all of Simon's previous payments redundant. "And Doctor Hizume wouldn't even agree to tha-!"

"Okay." Doctor Hizume agreed and shook Kamina's hand. "You'll start in ten minutes."

The back of his white coat was grabbed from behind and his head found itself lowered almost conspiratorially to Nurse Koshi's level. "What're you doing, you don't have the authority to make that decision, and besides, the big buffoon over there will just make a mess of things if you give them this chance."

Hizume silently wished he was allowed to smoke in the hospital, he really needed one right now. "Nurse Koshi, I have just had another talk with that high school girl with the pigtails that keeps visiting the coma ward every now and again, telling her that the chances of the boy she likes waking up are still very slim." What was her name again, Hori-something or the other. "The look on her face was almost soul crushing, so I see this as an opportunity to sow some mirth in an otherwise typically somber and melancholic day." Koshi still wasn't letting go. "And if they fail, which is very likely, we get two indebted janitors, and may I remind you we are understaffed as more and more of us are packing their things and leaving this town….so it's a win-win situation, we're sure to get some laughs from seeing them try. Schaudenfreude and all that."

The iron look in Koshi's eyes flickered. Things had never been easy in this hospital, but they had always been dreary. The atmosphere was both tense and depressing; with more patients coming in, and more doctors leaving. It was a wonder either of them were still there. "Fine, seeing the buffoon making an ass of himself should be fun."

"**YES!!!!"** Kamina laughed, thrusting his fists into the air. **"GET READY! BECAUSE WE'LL MAKE THIS PLACE SO CLEAN THAT EVEN THE FARTHEST AND DARKEST SHADOWS WILL BE OBLITERATED BY ITS BRILLIANT AURA!"** The wind from the open window suddenly picked up, blowing the hem of his hospital gown dramatically. Unfortunately the garment was then blown upward, revealing…well…the reason why Kamina's backside was feeling drafty, and making several spectators feel terribly inadequate.

"**ANIKI!!!"**

Koshi was quick to shield Simon's eyes. **"FOR GOD'S SAKE, PUT ON SOME PANTS!!!"**

**(Meanwhile)**

**(5)**

Far from revived, scantily clad, manly revolutionary leaders, a teenage boy of barely 14 years lay down on a familiar bed, staring at a familiar ceiling, and wrestling with familiar anxieties.

For all the time that had passed since his battle with Zeruel, nothing truly significant had occurred. Shinji even thought that he might as well have been asleep during all those fleeting mornings and nights.

Every day seemed sluggish and unimportant, a prolonged emotional inertia, that made him unresponsive to whatever did happen around him.

"_Shinji? I'm going to Hikari's place! Don't wait up…BAKA!!!"_

_SLAM_

The memory was far from unique, identical to several others involving his fiery roommate and fellow pilot, all equally as harsh, but nonetheless negligible. After the 14th Angel, she had spent an increasing amount of time at Hikari's house. Sometime ago, someone told him that she did so because she enjoyed the Class Representative's company, although Shinji had a sneaking suspicion that even if Horaki had evacuated like many others were, Asuka would still find some excuse to leave the apartment. She was probably either ashamed for how she had been doing against the Angels as of late, or angry at him for succeeding, though to be fair the last fight's outcome wasn't exactly his doing. The young Ikari made a pathetic try at conversing with her once, and she screamed at him for it. He did not try again.

As usual, despite him vividly remembering that they were probably at a hospital somewhere, Section 2 had proved useless; their search for recent patients with grievous injuries turning up fruitless.

"_With any luck this won't take too long, don't worry, I'll be back before you know it!"_

Misato's departure a few days ago had sent a small ripple of sadness through his current apathy, but those feelings had been placated by the fact that she would be back soon.

And Rei…well, for some reason had shown a bit of emotion when they retrieved him: a small glimmer of regret, or was that disappointment? As always, It was hard to tell.

"_Asuka shouldn't have been so upset about how things turned out."_ He found himself thinking. After all, he had tried to be the hero that time, and had wound up pleading for his life in front of a kid much shorter than him. _"That was stupid, thinking I could make up for what I did to…Unit 03 by charging in and…and maybe save the day for once."_

The frustrations of having missed a chance at redemption were not his main gripe, at least, not at this time. With Asuka and Misato gone, and PenPen nowhere to be found, Shinji found himself in a familiar state: that of being alone.

Loneliness for him, wasn't in itself awful. It was the fact that it was different from the sadness he felt at loosing his mother, harming Touji, and being distant from his father; it could be cured. Cured by reaching out to others.

"_But reaching out, I could just get hurt, right?_

Yes, that was true. Pain, harm, he wasn't a stranger to these, they practically engulfed him when he fought. But that was a different world wasn't it? A world of giant eyes and killer geometrical specters, surely he didn't have to hurt or bleed here, in the everyday, where he could find some measure of peace, albeit one drenched in solitude?

But he wanted company; a primordial force inside him was urging him to be near others.

Who could he go to though? Misato?

_"No, have no idea where she is…not sure what we'd talk about…"_

Asuka?

_"The point of reaching out is to not get hurt and she's in no mood to speak to me anyway."_

Someone less fiery and elusive then, Someone he knew wouldn't and couldn't hurt him.

_"Ayanami maybe?"_

A small memory, one of an escalator, from long ago, had the usually silent and unresponsive girl slapping him in the face for insulting his father.

_"No, she can, she can hurt me just like anyone else."_

How about a friend, a friend who can just be there, be there to listen, listen and not say anything that could cause you pain? Where would you find a friend like that?

_"Touji…"_ Shinji silently decided as he got himself out of bed. The maimed pilot was still in a coma at the local hospital, ever since…ever since the 13th Angel had put him there. Perhaps due to his own part in his friend's condition, Shinji had not gone to see him, at least, not yet. "I'll go see Touji…"

A sleeping friend couldn't hurt him, right? And with a quick straightenting of his shirt and a quick slip of his shoes, he was out the door…

…Yes…things are commencing….nicely…

**(Back at Tokyo 3 hospital)**

The first thought that came to Simon's mind after Kamina's proclamation was _**"PUT SOME PANTS ON THERE ARE KIDS IN THIS HOSPITAL!"**_

The next thought that came to Simon's mind after he realized that Kamina was entirely serious was _"We're going to die…"_

And that thought came to him once more, thirty minutes later as he found himself nearly passed out on the floor in exhaustion.

"_We're going to die…"_

Almost half the time gone and they weren't even a quarter of the way through cleaning the hospital. At first, things had started quite well. A few moments of teaching Kamina how to use the cleaning equipment (and getting him a janitor's uniform to match his own), and they were off, scrubbing, mopping, sweeping and gingerly disposing (of biological waste). They even washed an old guy or two.

Then upon reaching the third floor they just started to run out of steam. Completely understandable really: the hospital was quite large to accommodate all those injured in such a big and (honestly) hazardous city, rapid breathing from all that exertion had caused them to inhale a lot of the fumes coming from the chemicals they were using, Simon had never worked this much so quickly before, Kamina had actually taken time to polish the stairs, and one of them had only recently gotten out of a coma.

"Bro, I can't go on…" Simon gasped.

Kamina, not on the floor, but struggling to keep himself standing, gave his downed companion a look. "Don't….that." he managed to get out. "You've…always been the hardest worker of Jiiha village…" His hand pressed against the wall for support. "Don't tell me that living on the surface has made you soft."

Simon smiled, he had never thought of it that way, things were more easygoing in this world, at least, his life in the hospital was. The cramped tunnels and barren deserts of his world were a far cry from the hospital hallways and shining city of Tokyo-3. "Maybe it has…" he said morosely.

"Damn…our way of cleaning up is taking too long." Kamina heaved. "We have to find a way to wash this place down faster." Then he saw it, guarded by a sheet of black glass lay an object familiar to the boisterous man. "Is that a firehose?"

His friend lifted his head and indeed, a few feet away was a firehouse, enclosed in its protective red cabinet. "Yeah…it is…"

"Does it still shoot out water in this world?"

Simon's head began to droop back down, oblivious to the eagerness in Kamina's voice. "I think so…"

**CRASH!!!**

**(6)**

"_He didn't…"_ Simon's eyes snapped open.

He did.

"Okay, does it still work the same way?" Kamina had a foot against the wall, trying to wrestle the rest of the white tube out of its set coil.

"ANIKI! Someone might have been using that wheelchair!"

"The thing wouldn't open and no one was sitting on it when I threw it!" Pulling the hose out was surprisingly difficult. "I think it's stuck on something…"

"There are shards of glass everywhere!" Thankfully, none had hit him or his struggling brother.

"So? They'll be the first things we clean up after I get this stupid thing out of its case!"

"It's for emergency purposes only-."

"This is an emergency!" Kamina pulled harder. "The fate of mankind, maybe not here, but the one back home needs us! And we can't help them if we're stuck here working in this place. WITH THIS HOSE WE CAN ANIHILLIATE THE OBSTRUCTIONS OF FILTH AND GRIME, CLEARING OUR PATH FOR-." The hose bulged, as it had loosened the obstruction that had kept it in it reel…the valve…

And so did man bring about a flooding sream, flailed about and clinging to the maw of his foolishness, slamming onto the floor and ceiling, whilst drenching all in sight.

**(Outstide)**

Shinji stood, having suddenly found the faded lettering of the hospital's sign rather interesting.

Nothing was stoping him from going inside. It was just that, he could take his time in this case. Touji wasn't going anywhere. He wasn't nervous or afraid, nor was he having misgivings of any kind…really….he wasn't. He could take his time, no one was forcing him to do anything, not now anyway. He could take his time.

Take your time…

**(A few minutes Later)**

**(Inside)**

Water dripped down a corner of Nurse Koshi's nametag and sliently slipped off to fall into one of the miniature ponds forming at her feet. "Well hope you boys enjoyed your first hour as a clean-up crew." She spoke flatly. "Because as of today, you'll be doing a lot of cleaning for a very long time."

They were back in the lobby, all in some form or another, soaked to the bone. Koshi had decided to keep a close eye on the delinquent duo to make sure they didn't screw up and to be there if the large one's body finally wised up and collapsed. She was fortunate to have been there for the latter. Hizume had been unfortunate enough to walk in on the havoc.

Kamina and Simon themselves, sat back to back on the lobby floor, thoroughly drenched, and quite exhausted.

"This-is-your-last-chance." Kamina managed to pant. "Give up, and let us go, or face the terrible consequences."

Oh, now that was just fresh. "Mr. Kamina." The wet doctor muttered. "It's over, you've lost."

"Hour isn't over…"

Koshi's left eye gave a very noticeable tick. "You can start with what's left of the third floor…"

Simon sighed, he should have known things would come to this. "I'll get the mop…"

"Don't move Simon." Kamina weakly ordered. "We're men of destiny after all." You could almost taste the delirium in his voice. "You'll see, at any moment, the heavens will open up, and fortune will rain down, just like last time…"

Before Simon could remind him that the last time that had happened a giant robot and a scarcely clothed woman was what had fallen through, there was a faint creaking from above.

Those that could looked up at the grate of the air vents that ran along the ceilings of the complex. A crease had formed near the center of the grate and was quickly causing the rest of the plate to fold. The small sound of skittering was the prelude to a small, burry, brown bottom peaking out of the fold. Attached were two tiny legs that were fruitlessly attempting to grasp at the vent. The flap of metal grew and what everyone was sure were small paws audibly scratching at metal stopped, and a creature decidedly not fortune helplessly fell down from above.

Luckily, Boota was a quick thinker, he had to be to outwit his much larger pig-moles in order to survive. So the third semi-founder of the Gurren Brigade aimed to land in the softest possible place to cushion his decent.

And to further his blessings, Koshi had much bigger breasts than Yoko.

**(Outside)**

"_This was stupid,"_ Shinji chastised himself. _"I might not be the only visitor: Kensuke, Hikari, even his sister, they might be with him right now…"_ There could have been others, others that would see him, others that would judge him. "I should go." He said aloud, and was about to, when…

"**AUGHHH!!!!!"** a woman wailed from within the hospital.

Jovial shouting followed. **"HEY BOOTA!!!! LONG TIME NO SEE!!!!" **

Panicked apologies commenced.** "KOSHI-SAN I AM SO SO SORRY!!! HERE I'LL HELP YOU GET HIM OUT OF YOUR-. DON'T THROW HIM!!!!"**

Shinji was rooted to the spot, bewildered and inexplicably curious at this conversation.

"**SIMON…THAT THING IS YOURS??!!!"**

Simon…where had he heard that name before?

"**Y-YES, I-I'M SURE HE DIDN'T MEAN-."**

"**YOU'VE BEEN HIDING VERMIN IN THE HOSPITAL???"**

"**OI! BOOTA ISN'T A VERMIN YOU BIG RACCOON!!!!"**

"**THAT'S IT! BOTH OF YOU, TAKE YOUR FILTHY PET AND GET OUT OF HERE!!!"**

"**BUT WHAT ABOUT THE DEAL?"**

"**FORGET THE DEAL!!!"**

"**HAHA! NOW YOU REALIZE THE AWESOME POWER OF THE GUR-HEY! PUT US DOWN, WHAT'RE YOU? AHHHHH!!!!"**

Without warning, two screaming boys were launched through the hospital doors and right into Shinji.

**BAM!**

It had been weeks since Simon had felt physical pain, and he was quickly reminded why he didn't miss it. His head was spinning, it was hard to breathe, and there was something crushing him.

"Hey, you okay man?"

Whatever was heaped on top of him quickly got off and he could breathe again. The world that had exploded out of focus returned to order. Things were looking familiar now, including one of the guys who had crashed into him.

That hair, that height, those eyes…his stomach gave a slight spasm, remembering the point that had been jammed into it, with threats of going in even further if he didn't tell him where the hospital. He was sure, the darkness be damned, that this was that boy. And by the look on the lad's face, he recognized him too.

"Y-you-!" Shinji's shriek was interrupted by a harsh grip on his shoulder and he found himself looking into the red eyes of a man he hadn't ever met before.

The man pointed a calloused finger at Shinji's startled face. "You!" he said eagerly. "I know you!"

To be continued….

**(Misato) Preview:** As Gendo's discusses his latest machinations with his former Sensei, his son finds himself as the reluctant escort of SEELE's most wanted. Is the worth of battle scars determined by how many there are, or how deep they are? All that, and Kamina comes to a startling decision. Next on Neon Toppa EVA Lagann, Shape of Spiral, Shape of Man or "That Can't Be Right!!!"

**Author Note:** What, I said there'd be fanservice didn't I? Pantsless Kamina, Simon dominating Shinji, Simon pouncing and landing atop of Kamina, accidental flashing, the Gurren Brigade getting wet and wild, and to top it all off, Boota does his thing, with a nurse! Never say I didn't give you guys anything!

I'd like to apologize on how long it took to get this chapter out. Though I think it's been an improvement over how long it took to publish my last one. Funny story, I had started the Pilot episode in January, then I bought a copy of Persona 4 (property of Atlus), the rest is history. This time the culprit was the vastly underappreciated Beyond Good and Evil (property of that guy who did the original Rayman games), but that took a much shorter time to finish.

As Misato said, the mystery deepens, sorry the Ritsuko's revelation of the Evangelion's true nature to her best buddy occurred offspring, but I wanted to set that aside so I could shoe-in a lot of foreshadowing and shout outs to the first episode of Gurren Lagann into this chapter (and manservice, can't forget that). There might seem to be a lot of plotholes here like how Simon escaped detection for so long yada yada…but don't worry, I'll get to that.

Side note, how's the soundtrack working out for you? Should I drop it?

Is my Shinji in character so far?

Lastly, I have one simple request. Please post your reviews! I know there are a lot of you reading this that don't and still enjoy the story. But you have to understand, reviews fuel the fire of my creative furnace (the kind that produces, not the kind that immolates) and incinerates laziness and writer's block. I'm-already-running-low. .!!!!!!!...........ROSEBUD!!!!!! (Citizen Kane property of Orson Welles) Sorry, had to do that. But seriously, I'd love to know what you think of my story, and if you think I should keep it going. That also goes out to all those that may have this thing on story alert!

All in all, hope you had a good laugh, and hope to write you soon.

P.S. Love some of the ideas of what EVA Lagann looks like, and I hope more people get involved. I'd like it to be as much an enormous guessing game as Cloverfield was, except with less…not very bright Cameramen. Pictures are always welcome, and the contest is still on!


	3. Shape of Spiral, Shape of Man

Disclaimer: Still don't own nothing.

Author Note: Ouch, a lot less reviews for the previous chapter, I'm almost wounded, man. Didn't anyone enjoy the innuendo-laden "manservice" chapter? Eh? Well, I suppose it's because nothing really happened in that one, but no worries, things pick up here. Some replies to some reviews:

Kknd2: You'll get an answer to one of your questions here.

Escalus: I'd recommend watching Gurren Lagann, it's quite a good romp.

Goldamon X: Things will.

SM02: Thank you, that will be one of the main themes of the story.

Avatoa: I will, if I get more reviews for this one…hint…wink…hint…

Soundtrack Listing:

**(1)** What the Hell are You Thinking Inside the Dark? By Iwasaki Taku

**(2)** The Darkening Ground By Jami Sieber

**(3)** Mack the Knife by Frank Sinatra

**(4)** Tell It By Heart by Jami Sieber

**(5)** May Your XXXXX Soar! By Iwasaki Taku

**(6)** I'll Settle This with My Glasses By Iwasaki Taku

Note: If you don't have these songs in your library, keep in mind you can probably stream them on YouTube while you read. Just a suggestion.

**Episode 3: ****Shape of Spiral, Shape of Man or "That Can't Be Right!!!"**

The architects of Babel meet under the trees, while Angels look down from the Branches. 

**(1)**

The wilderness surrounding Tokyo-3 was as tenacious as it was undisturbed. Although frequently as much a victim of the Angel attacks as the city it adorned, it was nonetheless nearly as pristine as the wilds housed in GeoFront. In fact some argue that the Angel Attacks had been a mixed blessing for the Japanese forests, as for fear of having equipment destroyed and workers killed if one should suddenly occur, National and International Industries could never develop as deep into the forests as they would have in pre-impact times.

The military never invested troops, vehicles, or defenses of any sort, at least, not for long. Hard to maneuver through the trees, and mobility was everything when your enemies were hundreds of stories tall and wielded particle beam weapons like 5 year olds play with Bee Bee Guns.

Rarely anyone ventured into the woods. Doing so would bring them farther away from the city, from the shelters, from the guns, from the EVAs, from safety.

But the youth who stood at the base of still charred mountain, didn't have a care in the world.

"Such a pleasant place to bury a secret, wouldn't you say?"

His companions elicited no answer. They couldn't, and that was fine. They weren't supposed to after all.

Nonplussed, he tapped the ground with his toes. It did not yield, it felt completely solid, as if it had never been disturbed at all.

He smiled. "Not bad, hardly a shallow grave for the old war horses, quite deep in fact." Imperceptible to the naked eye, figures, estimates and algorithms, raced through his brain, calculating the exact depth and dimensions of the makeshift burial ground, before presenting him with the measurements he would require. "And though he probably doesn't know it, what little iron left in these mountains would thwart most tools of detection. The short one is quite skilled." He muttered. "Such lengths he's gone to protect his treasures…"

As he pocketed his hands, the ground below began to swell. Small rocks were cast into the air, and then paused before they could fall. Then they rose. Phantom particles at first, but particles became molecules, molecules atoms, and atoms solids, until whole clumps of earth were gently cast into the air. However, this was incomparable to the havoc filled procedures man usually undertook when he challenged the fickle crust of the planet. No, the displacement of soil to its eventual levitated state, was precise and calculated: a song of motion. Once the idea of earth breaking apart and rising of its own accord was dealt with, the mathematical beauty of this supernatural occurrence would placate whatever fear the bizarre scene roused in the minds of spectators, if his companions didn't kill them for seeing something they had no business seeing, that is.

More and more was lifted into the sky, until the closed lids of a colossal, silver face came into focus.

"Isn't he in for quite a surprise?"

**(Meanwhile…)**

**(2)**

"Good, as you were then." The stone-faced man with the orange spectacles said almost mechanically to the doctor on the other line, and with that said, replaced the phone on its plastic cradle. "The installation was a complete success Sensei, your doubts are apparently unfounded at the moment."

The older man at his side, his right hand man and former teacher, did not share this confidence at the Commander of NERV's latest scheme. "You know that wasn't what I was concerned about Ikari."

"Oh, and what would that be?" Gendo asked, his fingers intertwining in their trademark cradle.

Fuyutski grimaced, chastising his former student was always an awkward action, and sadly, one he found himself doing often. I felt like he was his teacher again, lecturing him on what mistake he had committed during this procedure or this measurement, back in simpler times, happier times. Times that were long, long gone. "If the integration of the S2 Engine had been completely incidental, we might have gotten away with it. But to actively salvage its remains and install it into Unit 01-."

And just like in those faraway memories, Gendo had a retort on hand. "The official record sent to the old men explicitly details how Unit 01 went berserk during the battle with the 14th, causing it to shred the beast into pieces and consume the S2 Engine completely by accident." Gendo replied. "All completely out of our control."

The Vice Commander tensed at the casual fabrication, one made truth by ink and word: in his eyes, a flimsy one. "Surely you don't think they'd fall for such an absurd story?"

"Their energies are devoted…elsewhere." The senior Ikari adjusted his glasses, and quietly continued, "Because of those…unexpected individuals."

"The JSSDF are moving in to Tokyo en masse." Fuyutski countered. "As well defended as we like to think the GeoFront is, they could still wipe us out at a whim!"

Gendo was nonplussed. "Again, to search for whatever's left of that shabby machine and its pilots at the behest of SEELE."

The old man standing next to him had to grin at that. Since the incident with the 14th Angel, SEELE had scrambled to learn as much about the interlopers as possible. They had managed, injured no less, to hold their own against the most powerful Angel to date and drove a machine made out of metal tough enough to withstand several of its attacks. They were an unknown quantity, an unforeseen occurrence, in short, everything SEELE despised, and were thus a threat. Yet, despite its best efforts, the most influential and powerful organization in the world was unable to find even the tiniest of clues to their whereabouts. His ex-student didn't even have the least amount of information on that 'shabby machine' or its pilots and still had the gall to slot them into his plans. It was a testament, frightening as it was, to the bearded man's ability to manipulate people around him, regardless of whether or not he actually knew where they were and what they were doing. As far as Ikari was concerned, as long as they never directly interfered with his scenario, they could go on keeping SEELE occupied. Fuyutski however, would never forget the flash of panic on Gendo's features as he watched the red machine puncture the Angel's AT Field. "And what of your son, Ikari?"

The sigh that followed sounded almost bored. "Given the unique circumstances that have befallen it, Unit 01 is under very tight observation. The S2 Engine's installation, contact with that foreign machine; the effects of either on its physiology are still being calculated. As such, the Evangelion will be quarantined for the foreseeable future and will most likely by prohibited from combating the next Angel." Despite knowing it was coming, the Vice Commander still felt a tinge of sad surprise as Gendo finished, recognizing the subtle message woven in his formal speech:

"_Therefore, because he cannot pilot, he is of little use to us at the present. His current condition is of negligible concern."_

As always…

**(Somewhere…)**

**(3)**

"**GRRK-! KU-KUGH!"**

During his tenure with NERV, Shinji Ikari had seen many unusual and terrifying things.

"I-Is it working?"

"D-d-Don't panic, I think we're almost there!"

A beautiful hexagonal prism that shot death rays from its surface, a sunken city haunted by a cruel-jawed leviathan, an acid-spewing spider that dwarfed buildings, a living bomb made of three immense Technicolor eyes, and even a warm water penguin.

"**nnGHH! Glu-Uk!"**

But despite all these incredible, though arguably traumatic experiences, Shinji realized…

"**AHHH!!!! HE'S TURNING BLUE!!!!"**

"**I SAID NOT TO PANIC! JUST KEEP POUNDING HIM!"**

…He had never seen someone choke on an **ENTIRE** chicken wing before.

As the blue haired boy's gagging intensified, Shinji was immeasurably glad that there were so very few people in the food court that day. Because if there was one thing Shinji hated, it was looking foolish. And he had no doubt in his mind that what he was doing, noble as it was, made him look immensely stupid.

Truth be told, there was nothing idiotic about using the Heimlich maneuver on a choking man. In fact, it was a rather practical solution for dislodging whatever foreign object, stuck in the victim's throat: Firmly strike the person on the back between the shoulder blades 5 times. Wrap both your arms around the abdomen, making a fist with one of your hands, placing it thumb side in the center of the abdomen. Grasp you fist with your other hand and give 5 abdominal thrusts by making a quick hard movement inward and upward 5 times. Keep this up until the object is coughed up.

And yet, practical as it was, like many things in Shinji's life, it wasn't easy. First, he had forgotten whether he was supposed to strike the person's back or squeeze his stomach first. Unable to decide which to start with one of his companions suffocating and the other panicking, he had the smaller boy strike the taller one's back while he attempted the latter step. Next, it just didn't seem to be working. The two frantic youths didn't know if their simultaneous actions were canceling each other out or if they weren't being done hard enough (the guy seemed to have some really tough abs), but 24 'abdominal thrusts' and countless back pounds later, and their charge was still choking.

Lastly, noble, practical, intelligent, whatever word one would use to describe it, performing the Heimlich maneuver with its 'Abdominal Thrusts' and retching victim, looked very, very embarrassing.

Just as Shinji was thanking his lucky stars that Kensuke wasn't around with a video camera to record this humiliating rescue, he felt the body in his arms spasm. Encouraged, Shinji gave one last mighty heave, and the offending poultry was blasted out of Kamina's mouth.

The three of them suddenly collapsed onto the hard stone floor, all weakened and panting from their respective exertions. Surprisingly, it was the one that was on the verge of death moments before who stood up first.

"Wooo…" he laughed, straightening his back. "I really thought I was going to die there!" his lips smacked as he got seated, trying to recall the flavor of the food that had nearly killed him. It wasn't half bad, there could have been more meat on them, but aside from clogging his windpipe, 'buffalo wings' were quite tasty. "Ita-itado-err…" he cast Shinji a withered look. "Oi Shinji, what was that word you say before you start eating again?"

"Ita-Itadakimasu?" Shinji managed to get out, praying to God that the man didn't try to eat another Chicken Wing.

Kamina scratched his head in light embarrassment, how could have done something as stupid as forgetting that word? Learning it was one of the last things he remembered doing before his lungs started to collapse from lack of oxygen. "Oh yeah…" he clapped his hands together as Shinji had done earlier. **"ITADAKIMASU!!!!" **And then he grabbed a fistful of french-fries, dipped them in a nearby bowl of miso soup, and shoved the mass of potatoes and broth into his mouth.

Shinji grimaced at the sight. "Ka-um-Sir? I don't think that French-Fries go very well with Miso…"

"Hm…" the man Shinji had erroneously given the dignified, honorific "Sir" chewed thoughtfully. "You're right! This stuff is too bland!" he scanned the table, looking for something amongst the various greasy dishes, sugary drinks, and quickly melting deserts to add a little punch to the humble liquid. "Ah, this ought to do the trick!"

"D-don-!" But it was too late, Kamina had already squirted a hearty liter's worth of crimson liquid into the small bowl. Normally, Shinji tried to hold a passive stance at whatever madness lay in front of him, a necessary survival tactic in his line of work (and his life at Misato's), but such a perversion of culinary aesthetic was just too much. **"THAT'S A SOUP, NOT A SAUCE!" **

The sudden roar nearly shocked Kamina out of his seat. "Okay, okay, relax Shinji." he slowly put the fries down, took the bowl of tainted miso into his hands, and downed it in one gulp. "Dah!!! That tasted terrible!"

"_That's because you're not supposed to put ketchup in it!"_ Shinji wanted to say, but just groaned instead as he got back in his chair. As slurps and crunches began to fill the air, he desperately wished that he had brought his SDAT with him, or at the very least the earplugs; silence or Bach, almost anything was preferable to the messy symphonies of Kamina's eating. _"Maybe if I get him to talk, he'll stop eating, at least for a little while…It's a better plan than waiting for him to choke again!!!"_ he thought. "Excuse me sir-."

"Stop calling me sir like I'm some old man!" Kamina shouted, sending a small spray of chewed food Shinji's way. "Call me Kamina!"

"S-sorry!" Shinji stuttered, making a mental note not to touch anything that had anything resembling saliva-covered hotdog skins or chocolate chips on it. "But, Kamina-san, may I ask?" He paused, wondering how he should proceed. It was a sensible question given the circumstances, but it was rather silly he hadn't asked it well over an hour ago. "How do you…know me?"

Simon seemed to take this as a cue to join in the conversation, and to busy himself with a nearby cupcake. "Yeah aniki, how do you know…" he made to look at Shinji, but hastily turned to Kamina, not quite ready to look the young Ikari in the eye. "…him?"

"Eh? Why wouldn't I know him? Hell I'd be surprised if you didn't know him Simon. How could I not know-!" he took a large swig of his soda. This stuff was great, it didn't sock him in the brain the same as sake or beer, but it bubbled pleasantly in the back of the throat and was almost unbearably sweet. Almos. Kamina's free hand fished something out of his pocket. It seemed to be a rolled-up magazine**. "-THE HERO OF TOKYO-3!!!"** he declared, slamming the tome onto the table.

At that assuredly absurd declaration, Shinji felt a strange swelling in his chest. _"Hero?"_ he gingerly picked up the damp book and started to leaf through the pages. _"H-Hero?"_

Simon eyed Shinji incredulously. _"Hero? This guy?" _The same sorry wimp that curled up into a ball after he was shouted at, he was a hero? That couldn't have been right, he was nothing like what a Hero should've been, nothing like Kamina! He didn't even know him long, but Simon could tell this was the kind of guy who was easily intimidated by a raised voice, tried to stay as far away from pain as possible, and constantly wanted to run away. Just like-Just like-…Then he wondered where Kamina had gotten that magazine. "Bro, where did you get that magazine?"

"The book with the weird symbols and amazing pictures? When I woke up, I tried to get out of bed, but I was a bit stiff, so I ended up landing face first on the floor." He rubbed a small bruise on his cheek. "I tried to pull myself up with a table, but something came loose and these really thin papery things fell down on top of me. So I looked through them while I was getting the feeling back in my legs."

"_Who puts magazines in a coma ward?"_ Simon rubbed his temples. _"Now I remember, there were magazines by Kamina's bed everytime I visited him. Never opened them though. That explains it then, Kamina got them from the-from the…wait."_ Only a quick double take by Simon stopped his cupcake from falling. **"YOU GOT THEM FROM THE HOSPITAL????"**

"You want one?" Kamina pulled three more out of-wherever he had kept the first one. "I got a couple more."

"That's hospital property! You can't just take it without asking!"

Kamina blinked, somewhat impressed by Simon's tone, totally annoyed by the message. **"IF I ASKED THEY WOULD HAVE SAID NO!!!!"**

"**THAT'S NOT A GOOD REASON AT ALL!!!!"**

"**WHERE WAS THIS RIGHTEOUS SENTIMENT WHEN WE GOT LAGANN?"**

"**I FOUND HIM!!!!"**

"**WELL I FOUND THESE!!!!"**

Shinji loudly coughed in an attempt to hide the giggle that was creeping up his throat. _"It's like watching a Boke and Tsukkomi Routine…"_ he briefly wondered if Simon had a paper fan with him to reprimand Kamina with. _"Why not, he's got a drill somewhere…"_ he shook his head, it wouldn't do to bring that up now, not while the mood was this light. He turned another page, and was greeted by a familiar scene.

It wasn't familiar in the sense that he had seen it himself. The nostalgia garnered from the images was akin to what an actor might feel watching recordings of himself perform: the subject seeing itself in the past, the memory of the activity brought upon from a spectator's snapshot.

The magazine must have been several months old; the paper was lightly yellowed and somewhat crumpled (though that may have been due to how Kamina had gone about carrying it.) Is must have been, it had been forever since he and Asuka had fought the 7th Angel.

There was nothing really significant about the page really; just some pictures of Unit 01 and 02 firing their guns at the twin behemoths, a shot of the two Evangelions backflipping to dodge Israfel's beams (which weren't even that impressive compared to Ramiel's), a few more images from the battle, and school photographs of the EVAs' pilots. The attached article glowingly expounded on how Tokyo-3 now had three giant war machines with which to defend itself and Japan from the Angel Menace. Standard NERV propaganda, didn't even mention how the two of them ended up half buried to the waist, head first in both the ocean and a hillside. He felt the strange swelling diminish at this thought. "You were impressed by this?" Shinji asked in a manner one could only describe as completely apathetic.

"Why wouldn't I be impressed?!" Kamina demanded, taking a break from his shouting match with Simon. "The purple Gunman's yours right? Can't say I'm a fan of the color, but just look at this fight!" Tanned figures flitted across the page, rapping against one photo in particular. "And this double diving kick at the end with your comrade that finished off that freaky monster-!!!! Just imagining the teamwork and fighting spirit involved in that one strike alone practically set me on **FIRE**!!!" The other pilfered magazines were casually thrown onto the table. "If that wasn't enough, I found these as well." He quickly opened them to the sections containing images from the Angel War.

The still clean back of Simon's hand rubbed at his eyes, before allowing them to see what lay before their owner: EVA 01 aiming the positron rifle as its bizarre target fired upon it, Sachiel being mounted by the purple mecha on the dark, abandoned streets of Tokyo-3, EVA 01 recklessly charging at purple whips of light that could cleave buildings, to name a few. There had to be some explanation for all this, and his mind raced to find one. _"Those…things are way too freaky to exist, they can't be real, these battles must have been fake!"_ But he remembered that merciless, empty visage that greeted them as they first entered this world, threatening to shred what was left of their battered bodies. _"Someone-someone else must have been piloting the purple Gunman! I've only got these images in front of me, but I can tell these beings are really strong. He couldn't-."_ Then an unpleasant memory of him ripping Shinji out of that large white cylinder came to mind. If anything, that had meant he had at least tried to fight that night. And why would they credit someone like Shinji as a pilot in the first place? Unless…he did do these things, in which case, Simon didn't know what to think anymore.

Kamina took Simon's bewildered expression, as one of mutual awe. "See, even my brother Simon is impressed! And though his accomplishments can't be taken lightly, he should be." He pointed at Unit 01 fighting Shamshel. "Look here, impaled by that giant, squid monster's pink, glowing things, and you still kept attacking! Fighting after such an injury like that ain't easy…" he said as a phantom pain stabbed at his stomach. "I should know."

In this casual statement, Shinji found a sizeable hole in what had been a solid rock of praise. He knew that Simon knew what he truly was; he had showed him in abundance at their first meeting, crying and whimpering on the grass as the drill was removed from his stomach. That wasn't how heroes acted. "You, you shouldn't say things like that Kamina-san. I didn't plan that. I was told to retreat, but charged at it anyway and got stabbed for my foolishness. My-my comrades were very cross with me for that little stunt. I'm sorry if you got the wrong idea." He gave a contented sigh from that confession. It was for the best, he didn't have the heart to delude this fellow anymore than the magazines already had. He closed his eyes, a familiar heaviness pressed on his back as that foreign warmth drained from his heart, and opened them to see the angered visage of a very livid Kamina.

Shinji had to suppress a yelp, he had expected Kamina to be disappointed, maybe even a little upset from learning of the deception. He hadn't expected this. And yet, just as he was oblivious to how he react, he had no idea why Kamina was mad.

How dare he, Kamina seethed. Making light of such an accomplishment, treating a victory like a defeat, and what, for a wound sustained for not retreating like some coward?! At least Shinji had knowingly thrown himself at his foe when he had been impaled, Kamina hadn't even seen his attackers coming! "Dumbass! Don't belittle your triumphs! That's something that only your enemies do to strip your heroic acts of courage and nobility." He leaned towards Shinji with an intensity in his eyes that caused the already meek Ikari to shrink even further. "And why are you talking about that battle like you lost it with that quiet voice? Where's the pride in saving this city?"

Shinji tried to look away, uncomfortable at being put on the spot like this. The Evangelions were built to protect Tokyo-3, so that's what he did, he had to or he'd be tossed aside. There wasn't anything courageous or noble in that. And even if he knew he should feel proud about beating an Angel, thoughts of all the property damaged and lives lost tended to squish whatever vestige of pride he had managed to generate. Besides, with all the help of everyone at NERV he couldn't say they were HIS victories at all, someone was always backing him up. "It isn't a big deal."

The reply was nearly whispered, but struck Kamina all the more. **"GOD! HOW DIFFICULT CAN IT BE TO TAKE A COMPLIMENT? YOU'RE JUST LIKE SIMON!!!"**

This made Simon, who was holding Boota over a milkshake so he could get a taste of the creamy concoction, drop the small pigmole into the still half-full glass to meet the accusation. "A-aniki, I'm nothing like this guy!" Shinji and he may have both piloted Gunmen, and beaten tough opponents, but he'd be damned if he was completely 'like' him, and all that encapsulated.

Kamina roughly yanked Simon towards him by the collar of his shirt. "Damned if you aren't!! You put your lives in danger, protect mankind from the threat of annihilation-!"

"I wouldn't say-!" one of them, perhaps both of the teens tried to correct.

"You be quiet!" Kamina commanded, pushing Simon back into his chair. "You do all this fantastic stuff and you don't even give yourself a smack on the back. **HOW HARD IS IT TO SHUT UP AND LET ME PRAISE YOU PEOPLE?!!!"**

Shinji couldn't believe what was happening. He was being chastised…for not trying to hog all the glory? He found that unfair, he would love nothing more than to accept all this praise and recognition, but he didn't deserve it. "But, but I can't accept it. There are a lot of people, people you don't see in the pictures Kamina-san, that help in the battles. They write up the plans, do the repairs, make the weapons, I barely do anything."

His head would have slouched down in its normal state of shame, had a two-page spread of Unit 01 holding up an enormous eye created to herald Armageddon with its AT Field not been shoved in his face. "**IDIOT!** You call this barely doing anything?! How many of these guys have you beat by 'barely doing anything'? Huh? Huh?"

"About…7?"

"**SEE!!!!!" **

"You don't understand. These aren't my victories, they're theirs…Without them, I wouldn't have won any of these fights." He whispered, the memory of him trying to take on the 14th all by himself, and the disaster that followed, writhed, and twisted in his mind. "So you shouldn't be saying such things…"

"**DAMN!** You're way too greedy Shinji!" Kamina groaned, falling back in his chair.

Shinji looked at the shouting custodian with surprise, then indignation. No one had ever accused him of being greedy before. "How's that?" he mumbled, eyes downcast.

"You want to do all the work yourself! And that's just plain rude! Other people want to help save the world too you know???!!!"

Well, that explained it, he thought that Shinji simply wanted to take all the credit for himself. Wonderful. "I can't do what they can do. So I have to rely on their help. I can't do anything alone." Shinji knew he shouldn't have been surprised by Kamina lunging at him, given his behavior in the last hour, but he yelped all the same.

But instead of tackling Shinji, Kamina grabbed Simon's shirt again, a small crack indicating that he had accidentally broken its collar in the process. "Putting yourself down for such a little thing. Well I've never won a fight without Simon by my side, but does that mean I've never won a fight? Well?"

Simon blinked, a drenched Boota still shaking in his hands. "Are you talking to me now?" He then found himself in a friendly, but still very painful headlock, courtesy of his surrogate sibling.

"Boo!!!!" the small bundle of fur on the table coughed.

"Fine…we might not look like much with just the **three** of us, but we're the Gurren Brigade! And a victory for one of us is a victory for all of us! If I bleed, we both shed tears. When I help him up, I'm helping myself up too! Working together to conquer adversity, I know the triumph in my hands is mine but they're also his and I know in my heart I still deserve it. That's the spirit of camaraderie!!!" Kamina cried, tightening his grip on his beloved and asphyxiating friend, looking at the cloudy orange sky all the while. "Do you understand Shinji-kun????!!!!"

The things that came out of Kamina's mouth were very inspired, but often circular and confusing in their initial delivery. People who knew him long enough gained the boon of seeing through these grammatical quagmires to glimpse the sincerity and meaning buried within them. Sadly, Shinji had only met the man that afternoon. "Not…really."

Seeing yet another similarity between Shinji and Simon made Kamina practically chucked the driller at his chair in rage. **"THE TWO OF YOU ARE MAKING ME SO MAD THAT I GOTTA, THAT I GOTTA-!!!!"** The table was given a harsh pound as he impaled a slice of pizza with his chopsticks. **"ITADAKIMASU!!!"** After shoving the whole thing into his mouth, and thankfully swallowing, he panted slightly, as if winded. "Now that one really hit the spot!" he smiled, his anger suddenly dissipating with his hunger. "Surface food is really the best!"

Shinji usually disliked abrupt subject changes in a conversation, but this was a most unusual conversation, and perhaps feeding this change would make Kamina forget about all those undeserved victories. "Surface food?"

"Yeah!!" Kamina said, grabbing a burger from the pile. "Didn't we tell you that we lived in the underground back in our world?"

Shinji swallowed. There was no question that these two friends and their pet were incredible alien; Simon could barely read and he suspected that Kamina couldn't read at all, the two members of the Gurren Brigade were all but oblivious to most of the social niceties the meek high schooler took for granted, and they took to 'surface food' like famished refugees to an all-you can eat buffet. On the other hand, they were speaking perfect Japanese, albeit in a rough Kansai-dialect. Thus, Shinji found the idea that they were from another world, very difficult to take in. And yet, if it could stop Kamina from praising him, then, he'd go along with it. "No, I don't think you did." In fact, he had been doing a lot more asking than telling. "Um, what was it like?"

"Awful!" Kamina replied. "The extent of a man's freedom stretched no further than the stone walls of the village, his ambition capped by the wretched roof above him, and his life threatened by sudden earthquakes!" Shinji had the distinct feeling that this was rehearsed somehow, but thought it best to let Kamina continue. "If it weren't for brave, talented drillers like my comrade Simon our village couldn't expand and our population couldn't grow, digging a tunnel for future generations to come through!!!"

Simon found his fingers nervously pressed together. "B-bro…"

Kamina didn't even give Simon a chance to finish. **"DON'T YOU START!!!"** As self-appointed leader of the Gurren Brigade, Kamina had the right to stop his underlings from denying how amazing they were. "Then again, it ain't all bad…if times are good, we get to eat all the pig-mole steak we can stomach!!!"

"What's a pig-mole?"

Boota gave a panicked squeak as Kamina closed his fingers around him.

He began to gently stroke the animal's sticky fur. "Boota here, he's a pigmole…" the tiny creature began to struggle, but to no avail, Kamina had him trapped, just like old times. At the very least, he wasn't being held between the man's thighs this time. "He might be a bit puny, but he's actually…." Kamina licked his lips, savoring the memory of how even a paltry morsel of Boota had managed to energize the famished Gurren Brigade. "…Very, very, very tasty." He raised the squirming pig-mole to Shinji. "Want a bite?"

"**BOOOOO!!!!!!"** the 'tasty' pig-mole cried.

Shinji gave Boota a quizzical look. How in the world did they know he was tasty, and why did he have a star shaped scar on its bottom? "No…thank you Kamina-san, I'm not that hungry." He was telling the truth, watching Kamina and Simon eat was enough to rob anyone of his appetite. Never mind that eating Boota, raw no less, was a very ill-advised prospect. "But if you lived underground how did you end up here?"

Kamina smiled, setting Boota down, and promptly planting his foot on the tabletop. "After the unsuccessful liberation of its tenacious leader, the Gurren Brigade found itself confronted by a humongous enemy that crashed through the oppressive ceiling that had hung over the village for ages. Drenched in blazing light beaming down from heaven…"

**(4)**

And so Kamina went, spinning a yarn so strange and absurd that it couldn't possibly be true. A tale of colossal machines called Gunman with faces where their bodies should be, a story of 4 black-clad siblings fighting a war against their oppressors with nothing but a few home-made explosives and based on his piecemeal descriptions giant shaggy dog steeds, a tragedy concerning a village that drew lots to decide who would go to the surface and certain death when the village's population exceeded 50, a bizarre fable of living bath=houses and their deadly (yet sexy) staff.

From the start, Shinji was fairly skeptical, then when Kamina boasted of how Gurren Lagann was born, things just started getting downright unbelievable. How could you fuse two machines by having one jam the other atop its head? You couldn't. What kind of hippo has a body made entirely of grapes? One that isn't real. If these 'Gunmen' did exist how was it possible that a single human (a scantily clad one at that) could take it out with just a sniper rifle? It wasn't. And speaking of that scantily clad woman, well, a bust size like hers (Kamina had stuffed **six **meatbuns in his shirt to illustrate) was too big to exist!!!

Still, he found himself taken in by Kamina's accounts. He widened his eyes at how they first burt through to the surface; the scope of their world going from small to immense as they hung from the sky, frowned at the mention of Rossiu's village, and blushed at his and Simon's multiple attempts to peek into the women's bath. Shinji was never on the edge of his seat, but he was entertained, that much he was sure of.

"You should have seen the look on Beryl's-."

"Viral's" Simon corrected.

"Right, sorry, I have a bit of trouble remembering the bastard's name. You should have seen the look on his face when he realized it was just Gurren that was kicking his ass!" he chuckled, a ghostly, frantic 'Idiot, where's your head?' echoing in his memories. "I'll never forget that day," he said, not shouted, not laughed, just said, probably for the first time since he started his story. "First time since we got our Gunmen that an enemy completely dwarfed us. It was so big, even combined, we'd barely be able to scratch at its ankles." He took a bite from his 3rd burger, making large melancholic chews. "Its arms, its face, its guns, its enormous…shadow, every part of it could make a man feel small." He smiled. "So much so that the only way to feel big again is to take it down!!!!"

Shinji didn't mean to yawn as Kamina finished, he wasn't bored, the sound just sort of slipped out. "G-gomen Kamina-san!!!"

Simon glared at the teen, the blush from Kamina's recounting of their hotspring exploits long gone.

Kamina on the other hand glanced to the sun and upon seeing how much time had passed, looked almost abashed. "No, no Shinji, I'm sorry, just give me a second to finish." Parched from telling of his exploits, he emptied an irritatingly warm glass of soda. "Putting it simply, I let my guard down, got injured, Simon managed to take Dai-Gurren from the enemy but got a little too enthusiastic with the guns. So I knocked some sense into him, we combined, and finished off their boss with our ultimate technique.

"As you can see, it was just a bit too 'ultimate', ended up sending us here somehow." Kamina shrugged, as if doing something as unbelievable insane as crashing through dimensions was nothing extraordinary.

Shinji suspected he acted as such because it had been unintentional. "Well…that's interesting."

"But I've been running my mouth." Kamina apologized, giving the table a hard, penitent smack. "Look at how much time I've wasted, we probably don't have much time to hear of your adventures!"

The 'hero' of Tokyo-3 paled. "My adventures?" Shinji gulped, the word tasting as foreign as Misato's cooking.

"That's right! Your adventures, your battles, your foes, your weapons." He tapped Asuka's picture with a wink. "Your conquests."

Shinji's face reddened. "W-well like you said, it's getting pretty late. I d-don't think there'd b-be any time for me to t-tell you all of them…" he stammered, hoping the sun would set faster.

Simon smirked at the boy's stuttering, recognizing the brittleness of his voice. He hadn't known whether to be relieved or disappointed that Kamina had left out so many details of what he was sure was their most trying battle, a skirmish that had nearly cost them both their lives. He hated relieving bad experiences after all, and no memory was more painful than seeing a loved one's life, so brutally snuffed out: Kamina, his parents. However, he did want to show the 'hero of this great city' how formidable the Gurren Brigade was. And now, unless Shinji was half the orator Kamina was, which he doubted, Kamina would see just how pathetic this 'hero' really was when he couldn't even speak of his so-called victories. "But Shinji-san, you don't have to tell us all your stories." He said, in a voice he hoped wasn't too drenched in venom. "I think you might have enough time for one…"

"I-I wouldn't know where to start."

"Then start at the start!" Kamina barked, eager to hear what he was sure to be a tale brimming with courage and daring. "When you first boarded your Gunman to unleash your unstoppable rage against the enemies of mankind!"

"_But I nearly died in that one! There has to be a better one than that!"_ He tried in vain to find a feat on par with Kamina and Simon's. All his battles had been won, true, and from someone unfamiliar with the circumstances, spectacular to behold. Yet he could not find any truly decisive triumph, there wasn't one among them that wasn't a close call or near brush with death. _"Well, if I don't have a better one, I might as well give him what he wants._

"_But how to begin-As the first salvos of the Angel War began to open in-?"_ No, even in his head that sounded cheesy, which made how Kamina managed to pull it off even more perplexing. "Maybe-no sooner had I stepped into Tokyo-3?" No, that wouldn't work either_. "Once upon a time?"_ Definitely not.

He sighed with the knowledge that however he chose to begin it would be trite talk compared to that of the Gurren Brigade's. He decided to get this over with, briefly wondering where Section 2 was when he needed them. "It was a few months ago when I arrived in Tokyo-3, my father had sent me a letter asking for me to come to this city." Nearly by reflex, an image of a young boy crying on a lonely street curb as his father left him behind came unbidden to his mind. "I was very, nervous, I guess. I hadn't seen him in 10 years, ever since my mother died." Shinji chewed his lip; even now it still hurt to think about that terrible day. Though, he was surprised at how instead of looking bored or annoyed at this slow start, Simon and Kamina looked somewhat, intrigued. Perhaps they could relate somehow? "I was trying to call what I thought was his office, when the phone lines went down. Someone was supposed to pick me up you see, but looking back, I can see why they were late." He wondered if he ought to show them that picture of Misato he had been looking at that particular afternoon. But thought better of it, his focus was frayed as it was without having Kamina compare her measurements to Yoko's. "That's when I first saw the Angel. The funny thing was, I wasn't scared or excited when it came. I was just, shocked, I didn't know what to think." Again, he chanced a look at his two-man audience, and seeing they were still paying attention, continued. "It wasn't until after the bombs hit that I was broken out of that weird trance. These flying gunships attacked it with everything they had, but they couldn't stop it. In fact it nearly stepped on me." He wished that there were a way he could convey the ferocity of that moment, of how deafening and blinding those explosions were, of how terrifying it was to see the 3rd Angel stand there unscathed.

"It was then that Misato-I mean Major Katsuragi arrived." He said, thinking that the honorific would give his narrative a little more importance. "We managed to escape the Angel and an N2 Mine blast (sort of) and headed to NERV headquarters." Shinji hesitated, and wondered if he should be telling this to two complete strangers. But Section 2 would have stopped him if he wasn't allowed to do so, right? Besides, it was time to show how truly great the men and women of NERV were compared to his pitiful self. "It's an organization that fights Angels, but it does more than that. This world, I know you think this world looks great." And knowing that their Earth, if they were telling the truth, was just a barren desert of a world, he couldn't blame them. "But it's a very wounded one, when the Angels first came, they caused something called Second Impact." Near the day he was born of all times. "It changed everything, the weather, the wildlife, the land, the sea. Half of the world's population died because of the natural disasters that followed." To his surprise, Simon's stern expression softened at the mention of the event. He wondered why. "NERV's scientists, are all working very hard to repair the world and reverse the effects of Second Impact. I've read that countless species of animals went extinct because of the changes in environment, imagine, if they could come back. After the Angels are defeated, NERV can focus on getting the world back to normal."

Shinji would have been flustered to learn that Gurren Brigade could not grasp the gravity of an extinct species or the repercussions a climate change could have on the entire world. Although, Shinji would have been glad that the main point did get across. Simon and Kamina tried to imagine half the people they knew disappearing in an instant, and shuddered slightly. The older of the two looked down at what could only have been NERV's insignia, a fragile orange leaf, so delicate and willowy compared to the Gurren Brigade's blazing, sunglass-sporting crimson skull, with a newfound respect. Crushing enemies by the hundreds, that was easy, mending the wounds of an entire planet, now that was something. "Go on…" their silence practically, whispered.

"We met up with one of those scientists, Rits-I mean Doctor Akagi, and they took me deep underground. I was brought to this dark room, and I thought that I was led there to meet my father, I was partly right." He'd never forget what did greet him when the lights turned on. Those fierce, yet lifeless, eyes that bore into his, and the eerie, unnatural face that held them, the orange liquied it was floating in, belying the rest of its immense form. It was frightening, it was huge, it was purple. "I saw this giant metal…thing. They told me it was an Evangelion, the ultimate fighting machine, mankind's only hope against the Angels. And they wanted to me to pilot it." He rushed that last part, even thinking it made him feel uncomfortably important.

"It was just like when I saw the Angel, I was frozen in shock, debating whether to stay or flee. Then all of a sudden my father's stern voice filled the chamber." His fingers involuntarily laced together. "He looked down from this balcony I hadn't noticed before, and ordered me to pilot the EVA. I thought he was joking, how could I pilot a machine I had never seen before, but his tone was so-so cold and flat-." Like a frozen tundra, Shinji thought bitterly. "-That I knew he was serious. The first thing he said to me, after years without so much as a phone call or postcard, was that he needed something from me." Shinji smiled sullenly, and if Simon knew what he was about to say, he would have done the same. "So I refused."

This was the moment he had been waiting for, now Kamina saw what he really was; a spineless, pitiful, dirty cowar-.

"What changed your mind?" Kamina asked, without a trace of disgust or contempt.

"Rei." Shinji said before he could stop himself, his hands uselessly scrambling to his mouth, too late to stop the name from escaping. _"Idiot, don't refer to someone so casually, in fact, why did you refer to her at all?!!"_

Simon had heard of course, and despite his satisfaction at Shinji's confession of cowardice, he couldn't help but ask, "Rei?"

Shinji lowered his hands in defeat and sighed. It looked like he'd have to complete his sorry tale after all. "When I refused to pilot Eva, my father ordered that someone named Rei be brought out to take my place. A first I was relieved, fighting the Angel would be someone else's responsibility." He sickened at recalling that thought, that wish for someone else to be burdened with the impossible task, to take the blame. He did after all, get that wish. "And then this gurney wheeled in. There was a girl lying on top of it." His eyes rested on a partially crumpled photo.

Intrigued despite himself, Simon smoothed out the creases on the page to reveal a pale, blue-haired young girl staring blankly at the camera with deep red eyes. Funny, she reminded him of one of those bunny girls from the hotsprings. "Is this her?"

Shinji gave a hollow nod. "Yeah, but she was hurt." That was the first thing he looked at when he saw her, those injuries: the broken arm, the damaged eye, and those wounds wrapped in snow white bandages speckled with blood. "Very hurt…and…she couldn't even stand. The way she was breathing, you could tell it hurt to even move…and they wanted her to pilot." The sullen pilot purposefully left out his rushing out to reach the downed Ayanami; it had been a useless gesture, holding her simply brought her more pain, and it wasn't like he had caught her. "If Ayanami tried to fight the Angel, she might…you know...so that's why I changed my mind." He said. "I'm sorry to say that I don't remember much about the first battle, I know that the angel was beaten, but that's about it."

Rather than shout for more details, or erupt in fevered applause, Kamina remained strangely taciturn.

"_That's odd,"_ Simon thought, knowing full well that among his brother's extremes, silence wasn't one. "A-aniki?"

Kamina blinked and briefly shook his head. "That's-uh-alright Shinji. I bet you just won so easily that you didn't bother to remember such a quickly won victory."

The nearby driller highly doubted that but held his tongue, and resumed looking at the magazines with a newfound interest.

"Maybe?" Shinji offered, surprised that Kamina was still sitting next to him, let alone complimenting him.

The brash leader of the Gurren Brigade lightly chuckled. "Damn, it's really getting late. Sorry we kind of hogged the spotlight, you must be angry for not being able to tell us the rest." His hand made an offhanded wave. "It's just that I got a bit excited. I wanted to compare battle scars with a guardian of humanity." He threw a handful of noodles onto his burger, making Shinji wince in disgust and Simon snicker in amusement. "Who would have thought that we'd meet a guy like you here? Before Kittan and the rest joined us, we were really the only humans piloting Gunmen. Even then, it's really rare to meet a fellow Gunman pilot, eh Simon?" he asked, raising the hybrid sandwich to his lips.

Simon nodded, frayed nerves put at ease by Kamina's words, and looked to Shinji with a genuine air of merriment. "To be honest…Shinji-san, you're probably the only one that's had more fighting experience than us."

Kamina froze, jaws comically stretched and paused mid-bite, the burger hovering over his tongue. "Waaa?" he somehow asked without closing his mouth.

Whatever signals Simon could have read off of Kamina's dumbstruck expression to perhaps retract his careless statement, utterly escaped him. If they hadn't, well, perhaps Simon could have taken time to phrase his reply in such a way to placate the confustion boiling in Kamina's being, rather than sharing a piece of smoked squid with Boota. "We've only fought in 6 battles, Shinji's won 7. So he's had more experience than us." He said, glad that Second Impact hadn't wiped out this particular animal. "Why?"

Up till that point Kamina had never been angry with Simon before. Sure he got a little frustrated when Simon thought he couldn't do something, or disagreed with one of his ingenious plans, but never angry. Never felt rage; red, hot, seething, surging, blinding rage at Simon. And now he did.

"**NAAAAAAANIIIIIIIII???!!!!"** Kamina screamed, grabbing Simon by his broken collar and violently shaking him. **"TRAITOR!"**

The realization that he had something incredibly stupid hit home, although, far too late for Simon's liking. "T-Traitor? I'm not a traitor!"

"**THEN WHY ARE YOU SAYING SUCH TRAITOROUS THINGS???!!!!"** he lifted Simon up with a look on his face so fierce that for the first time that day, Shinji felt sorry for the diminutive teen that had threatened his life**. "THE INVINCIBLE GURREN BRIGADE IS THE MOST POWERFUL ORGANIZATION ON ANY WORLD, HOW CAN IT'S ACCOMPLISHMENT BE RIVALED OR INFERIOR TO ANYONE???!!!!** **THAT CAN'T BE RIGHT!!!"**

"But it's true." Simon drawled out, dizzy from the violent joggling. "There was that battle in our village, the fight where you got Gurren, that time we beat Viral, the attack of that 14 faced Gunman, that time at the bathhouse, and the siege of the Dai-Gunten." he heaved, nearly throwing up. "That's all."

"**WHAT ABOUT THAT TIME AT ROSSIU'S VILLAGE?!!!"**

"The elder did most of the work remember?" Simon said. "But to be fair, we have beaten more opponents than him…"

"**BAKA!!! NO MATTER HOW MANY FOES YOU BEAT IN A FIGHT IT STILL ONLY COUNTS AS ONE FIGHT!!!!"**

The novelty of Kamina admonishing his precious teammate slowly eroding with Asuka's favorite nickname for him, Shinji decided to intervene, if only, to stop Simon from vomiting all over them. "Kamina-san, don't worry. Like you said, it's just been the two of you for the most part, and as I mentioned earlier, everyone at NERV has been helping fight the Angels since the start, so your victories should count twice as much."

"**STOP BEING SO SELFISH!!! THE TRIUMPHS OF THE GURREN BRIGADE ARE TO BE SHARED, NOT HORDED BY ITS MEMBERS. YOURS ARE THEIRS, THEIRS ARE YOURS, THAT'S TEAMWORK!!! WHETHER IT'S ME, SIMON, YOKO, OR EVEN LEERON THAT LANDS THE KILLING BLOW, THAT CONQUEST BELONGS TO THE TEAM. SO THE SUCESSES OF NERV ARE YOUR SUCESSES, DUMBASS!!!"** he paused, a disturbing thought creeping into his consciousness. "Wait…including yours, how many battles has NERV won?"

Shinji wanted to lie, so, so very much. The truth would only make things worse. So why did he have to yelp, "Around 11 or 12…?"

Kamina gagged, releasing Simon as he did so. There had to something the Gurren Brigade trumped NERV at. It couldn't be quality of opponents, all of Angels he had seen were colossal, those Beastmen's mecha and Kerel (or was it Wikal) couldn't even begin to compare. What did it matter that all those fights had been unbelievably awesome, especially the last one against Thymilph and his forces? That's when it hit him. **"DRAMA! SIMON, SHINJI, THE ONE THING NONE OF YOU CAN DENY IS THAT EVERY ONE OF THE GURREN BRIGADE'S BATTLES HAVE BEEN MONUMENTAL IN SCOPE!!!" **he put his two fists at his sides, sticking his chest out proudly.** "WHY IN JUST OUR LAST BATTLE WE FOUGHT OUR ENEMIES TO A STANDSTILL, SURROUNDED BY AN ENTIRE MOUNTAIN RANGE OF ERUPTING VOLCANOES, OUR BURNING PASSION BEING THE ONLY THING HOTTER THAN THE LAVA SWELLING BENEATH US. PASSION SO UNSTOPPABLE THAT NOT EVEN THE BARRIERS OF REALITY ITSELF COULD STOP OUR ULTIMATE ATTACK FROM DRILLING THROUGH THEM AND DOCKING US IN THIS STRANGE NEW LAND."** He cried, trying to make the last part sound as intentional as he could.

Shinji smiled in relief, though it was a great disservice to NERV to say that any of the Angel Attacks had been nothing short of biblical, at least he'd be able to get Kamina off his back. "You're right Kamina that's incredible. I've never ripped holes in time and space. And I've never fought while volcanoes were exploding. The most I've ever done with my EVA is jump into one of them."

The mighty jaw of the Demon Leader, which he had lifted up in exaltation to the great deeds of the Gurren Brigade, dropped at Shinji's meek surrender. _"JUMPED INTO A VOLCANO?!" _Kamina mentally screamed. _"This guy is just too good! I should have known Simon and I were outclassed the moment I first looked at those pictures!"_ his two companions, and a pig-mole, where staring at his petrified form now. _"I was stupid to think I could dazzle him the Gurren Brigade's reputation and prowess alone. How am I supposed to get him to join us now??!!!"_ Kamina could not deny that he fancied recruiting Shinji (and by proxy his gigantic Evangelion) into the Gurren Brigade. He'd probably get along with Simon, they were a lot alike really.

The magazines showed that he was a capable warrior, and Kamina could practically imagine the purple monstrosity carrying an equally titanic flag of the Gurren Brigade, as it felled hundreds of Beastmen with the Gurren Lagann perched on its shoulders, arms crossed. The image made him smile.

He hadn't the faintest inkling of the true extent of the boy's skills, and now he felt terribly embarrassed for it. _"What can I do? He won't serve under someone weaker than him, I sure as hell wouldn't! Maybe we should fight! Yeah, then we'd see who the best really is once and for all!"_ 4 minutes had passed since Kamina spoke, and Simon and Shinji were beginning to fear that he was choking on something again albeit in a much subtler fashion.

"_No that's stupid, he's a defender of mankind! We're all in this together, it would stupid for us to fight!"_ He had to think, there needed to be a way for the Gurren Brigade and NERV to benefit from an alliance. He had to think! He had to think! He had to-.

"**I NEED TO USE THE BATHROOM!!!!"** Kamina screamed and bolted from the table as fast as his slippered feet could carry him.

**(Later...)**

Ten minutes later, Boota had fallen asleep, the last traces of warmth had left what little food remained on the table, and Kamina was still gone, leaving Simon and Shinji alone, in a manner of speaking.

Shinji stared at the cold remnants of the once enormous bounty he had paid for, realizing that he had barely eaten that afternoon, and would probably have to cook something up when he returned to Misato's. He ought to have been hungry, he had spent the greater part of the day giving an impromptu tour of Tokyo-3 to what he had initially thought to be a very loud and very enthusiastic tourist, albeit, a tad mentally handicapped.

"_Fuah! Shinji, Simon, why the hell is this water so damn salty? What, is this 'ocean' made out of sweat and tears or something?"_

"_Quit honking that horn while I'm on top of this thing and drive! I want to see how fast these 'cars' can go!"_

"_That symbol is of a lady in a dress? I thought it was a guy wearing a cape!!!"_

**(5)**

Now that he no longer felt the horror and panic he had during those instances, Simon could crack a small smile at all the blundering Kamina had done that day. Asking the names of everyday objects in a booming voice while people gave him harsh, quizzical looks; almost getting run over as he tried to get a better look at a 'Don't Walk' sign, badgering him and Shinji for knowledge all the while. They served as a pleasant reminder that as embarrassing and pushy his brother could be, Simon just knew that life could never be as grand without him. Watching Kamina gape in astonishment at the fast-food displays at the Tokyo-3 food court, and then ravenously digging into every dish he could get his hands on, Simon had never felt so happy in his life. How could he have been possibly content with his comrade silent and unmoving on a cot? He hadn't been booming and vibrant, not like the Kamina he knew? But now he was back, he'd made a full recovery, so why did Simon feel so miserable?

Shinji was sure he had almost gotten a heart attack when Kamina had dragged him on a whim with little more than a grin and a laugh, only to nearly get killed several times over (an entire chicken wing!!!) and do things that Shinji would never dream of doing in fear of dying of embarrassment. Yet, for all those he made, Kamina was fairly nonchalant towards his mistakes. Sure he was completely oblivious to most of them, but when he did realize he had made one, he'd just shake it off and move on. It was strangely endearing. He could look at that night three weeks ago with a bit of pride. Based on how, spirited, Simon had been, Shinji deduced that he hadn't been the one that had needed a doctor. Even with all the glares and thinly-veiled aggression Simon had given him, Shinji somehow knew that he wasn't the type of person to do an act as aggressive as threatening to murder someone. He must have been desperate to help someone close, someone whose life he valued over his own. So, in his own cowardly way, Shinji had helped save that someone, and he was glad for that.

Initally, even with all those intense battles staring him in the face, Simon thought Shinji was little more than a pathetic, craven, loser. Then he had to go and tell him that story. That boy he had labeled as a weakling, had piloted, to protect another person, a person in need and close to death. No matter what Simon thought of him, people who willingly put themselves in danger for the sake of others deserve more respect than what little he had reluctantly given. "I'm…very sorry."

Shinji turned to the direction of that voice, unsure if he had heard what it had said. "Huh?"

"About, that night, when we…" Simon swallowed. "…first arrived, remember"

"Oh, that…" Shinji remembered all right, he doubted he could forget.

"I didn't say or do all those things because I had something against you." Simon lied, watching Shinji crumble had brought a vestige of, sick satisfaction that he was even ashamed to remember experiencing, but it was better that he not know that. "Aniki…Kamina…he was very hurt in that last battle…very hurt…" he swallowed. "…he was going to die if he didn't get help….and he still kept fighting…the Beastmen, that…Angel…his voice was so faint near the end of that last one…" his lips began to quiver, recalling that sick satisfaction that had overridden his immense fear for that barest fraction of time. "I didn't know what to do…I didn't know where to go…and then he'd die, all because I couldn't find help…I was desperate…" he hung his head. "…please forgive me…"

"_It's okay."_ Shinji wanted to say, but the words wouldn't come out. Apologies weren't foreign to him, he said them enough to the point that Asuka was sick of them, but no one had ever apologized to him, for anything; not his father for leaving him, not Rei for slapping him, not even Touji, instead preferring to take a punch for the one he had inflicted on Shinji as penance, rather than outright apologize. He imagined what it would be like to refuse to answer, leaving Simon hanging as punishment. He could have rejected his apology, see if Simon would mope, cry, or beg. He could have. "It's okay." But he didn't. Before he started doing it to get attention and acknowledgement, Shinji's piloted EVA for reasons very similar to Simon's. Not anymore though, those days were long gone now. But there were still people like Simon who still did it for those reasons, and they deserved whatever small mercies life could afford them. "I understand."

Simon opened his mouth to speak. It couldn't have been that simple to forgive someone. He needed to say more didn't he? That light feeling filling him wasn't from all the guilt and shame fading away, could it? He was humoring him, trying to placate his worries; there wasn't any sincerity in those words at all! Was there?

To Shinji's growing anxiety, accepting Simon's apology had failed to ease the tension between them. The surrounding ambience was still as taut as a tightly wound cello string. Building on that analogy, the mood could be lightly tuned to a less rigid adjustment. Or a bare foot could come out of nowhere and stomp on the table, startling the uneasy youths and harshly plucking the awkwardness in twain. **"I GOT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!" **Kamina bellowed.

"G-got what?" Simon and Shinji blubbered in unison.

"The ultimate solution to saving both our worlds, that's what!" Kamina declared, thrusting his finger into the air. "Listen up! Even as we speak, incalculably far away our fellow Gurren Brigade members are struggling to survive. Though gifted with the courage and ambition of a thousand armies, they find themselves up against enemies of far greater number and skill, the minions of the Spiral King! Tenacity and a strong back can only take you so far, we need counsel, tutelage, and guidance!" the finger fell and Shinji dumbly looked behind him, wondering what Kamina was pointing at. "That's why we need you! **PLEASE TEACH US, SHINJI-SENPAI!!!!"**

"**S-SENPAI?!"** Shinji cried, falling out of his chair.

"**TEACH US?"** Simon cried, rising from his seat. "What are you talking about?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Kamina smirked, making a motion to adjust his shades for emphasis, though they were nowhere near his face. He'd have to ask Simon where he stashed them later. "We need all the help we can get if we're going to liberate mankind. And with Shinji's experience and your drill, the Beastmen won't stand a chance in hell. Or heaven for that matter, since we'll have a hero of the Angel Wars on our side."

"Wh-wha-?" Shinji stuttered, first Senpai and now Hero, what would it take to make Kamina see what he really was? "I couldn't possibly!" he shook his head, eyes clenched "There's just no way!"

"You heard Shinji-Senpai." Simon seethed as he looked down at Shinji, the resentment returning to his voice. "He won't do it."

Kamina flicked the driller's forehead, eliciting a yelp. "That's because he thinks we'll be mooching off of him." He explained. "And he wouldn't just leave his precious city and the people in it to those Angel Bastards to come with us. That's not what a hero would do. Which is why we're going to form an alliance!"

"A-alliance?" Shinji asked, his head ceasing to shake.

"That's right, between NERV and the Gurren Brigade! A coalition that's going to shake the stars! But I wouldn't expect your team of elites would want a squad of rookies holding them back, so that's why we're going to show you we've got what it takes to stand shoulder to shoulder with you guys!" he crossed his arms in a way he thought appropriate for such a valiant offer. "We're going to help you take those Angels down and end this war!"

Shinji was having trouble breathing. These guys, end the war, were they insane? Why would they want to voluntarily fight the Angels, he didn't even want to fight them! He wanted to run away, with only the fear of being tossed aside keeping him on the battlefield. He had nothing else besides EVA. The two odd persons in front of him didn't need to pilot to stave off loneliness, they had each other, wasn't that enough? He couldn't risk one of them getting killed while trying to save his worthless hide the next time an Angel attacked. "You can't, you shouldn't, you don't know what it's like! I'm not even sure if this war can end!"

"Why not? It's simple!" Kamina loosely asked, you'd think with all the times Shinji had won he'd feel a bit more confident. "Next time an angel comes along, we'll beat it up and then after we make it surrender, we'll ask where it's base is." He got his foot off of the table, and walked around it, pulling Simon to himself by the shoulder. "Then we'll find it, and annihilate them with Simon's drill! Hell, you don't even have to do anything Shinji-sensei, just sit back, sip a cola, and watch us show you we're worthy of your knowledge! Then you can come back with us with your allies to teach our comrades how a real Gunman pilot fights!" He frowned, noticing the scowl on Simon's face. "Oi Simon, what's wrong? If all goes well, we'll have three gigantic Gunmen on our side and a veteran to boot. You'll have a whole new batch of people to show off to."

The sides of Simon's lips tugged slightly. How could Kamina miss the point so completely, and still find a way to placate him. "I guess…"

That tug worried Shinji even more. Based on his cruel tone, Shinji thought he could depend on the small boy to enforce the idea that this plan was stupid, but now it looked like Simon was agreeing to it. "Even if you do, how are we going to get you back home? You don't even know how you got here." He whined.

As those words left Shinji's trembling lips, Kamina released Simon and circled the table until he was facing the downed EVA pilot. "You've got scientists who are out to heal the world, remember. I'm sure they'll figure something out." His hand reached toward Shinji, open and strong. "Don't be such a glory hound veteran. We're all in this together."

Shinji doubted that. Would Doctor Akagi even know the first thing about alternate dimensions, did the equipment needed to traverse such preposterous zones even exist? He didn't have the authority to make this decision, for all he knew he would be signing NERV up with some kind of mentally ill street gang with delusions of crimson champions and underground cities. What would Misato think, what would Asuka think, what would his father think? These worries were far too obvious to escape even a simpleton's logic.

The hand hovered in front of him, stable, confident, and unwaveringly still in the tumult of his bewilderment. It was a worn appendage, rough and scarred from a harsh life replete with setbacks, yet made all the more stronger for them.

And perhaps, that's why he took it.

Hmmmm….

**(Later…)**

Shinji had just done a very foolish thing, and felt inexplicably chipper for it. After he had taken Kamina's hand and said yes, the man pulled him and Simon into two crushing headlocks, and practically jumped into the air with the two of them tucked under his terribly, damp armpits. He ordered another round of cola to celebrate the newfound union and in the scant minutes before the stores closed, went over possible ideas over what to call it.

"_I don't know bro, The EVA Lagann Alliance doesn't sound very catchy…"_

"_What about league, federation, partnership, brotherhood, fraternity?_

"_I think it's the EVA Lagann part he's unsure of."_

"_But that's the name of our ultimate weapon, right veteran?"_

"_Ultimate weapon?"_

"_In case things get hairy the two of you will have to combine to form EVA Lagann, just like when we fought that Skull faced thing!"_

"_I don't really remember much of that fight…"_

"_Me neither."_

"_Stop being modest about awesome fights I wasn't part of…__**AND DRINK MORE COLA DAMN YOU!"**_

Much to his own personal shock, despite having wanted to get as far away from them as possible when he thought they were kidnapping him, Shinji had actually asked if they wanted to stay the night at Misato's. Thankfully, Kamina adamantly refused, spouting that they weren't worthy of sharing a roof with the 'HERO OF TOKYO-3", just yet, and parted ways along with Simon and Boota. Before they vanished from view, the boisterous bluehead felt the urge to remind Shinji, very loudly, that they'd prove their mettle in the next Angel battle, and would impress the EVA pilot so much that he'd have to take them as his apprentices.

Senpai, sensei, veteran, were words he couldn't even fathom associating with himself. Which made how Kamina said them so naturally even more perplexing.

A thousand different thoughts of how things could go wrong, worries over what he had done, and questions inquiring on matters that were trivial and at the same time troubling, chose now in this moment of bliss to crash down upon him. In a brief submergence of distress and dread, he forgot how to breathe. Annoyed, he hummed in place of listening to his SDAT to drown this unease in the dulcet pieces of Bach and Mozart. All too rare did he feel this significant, this flattered, and so he decided to savor it for as long as he could.

However, if he had chanced a look into that dark alley just a quarter of a mile shy of where the restrooms were he would have satisfied one of those trivial/troubling questions:

Whatever happened to Section 2's agents?

Because his answers would have been found there in abundance. Lying unconscious and bruised, black spectacles and taut expressions broken, with Kamina's missing slipper carelessly perched on the heap.

**(Elsewhere…)**

**(The wilderness surrounding Tokyo-3)**

Kamina was seeing red, and he was loving every second of it. True, wearing sunglasses at night wasn't very practical, except when you wanted to look very impressive during a dramatic speech, but he had worn them even in the darkness of Jiiha village when he hadn't the faintest idea what a sun once. He hadn't been very practical then, why start now?

"We've had quite a day, eh Simon?" Kamina asked, unsheathing his nodachi to see if it had rusted during his weeks of absence.

"Hmmm…" Simon grunted as he dug deeper into the ground with his tunnel drill.

Relieved that the blade was untarnished, Kamina started dusting off his cape next. Even with a shirt on his back he had felt rather naked without the crimson mantle. "We got out of paying that outrageous debt, ate some top quality service food, drank so much cola that I'm about to burst, and even got to meet the hero of Tokyo-3."

CRACK!

An earthen thundercrack resounded from where Simon was drilling and the ground exploded in a geyser of dark soil.

Kamina raised his cape to shield himself from the debris, lightly cursing as several pieces of gravel landed in his hair. "Damn Simon, drilling a little hard there today, aren't you?" he coughed.

Through the dust, Simon's reply, timid and curt, drifted to his companion, like the whispers of a bitter spirit. "Aniki…you barely know him, for all you know, he might not be the person you think he is. I'm not even sure he could help the Brigade"

Kamina brushed some of the dirt from his hair, noting distastefully that his flesh was rather sticky under his touch. He really needed a bath. "I know enough; he's saved this city several times over, works with some rather pretty (if poorly developed) girls, has a bigass Gunman…" the harsh, whirling noise Simon's drill made sounded unimpressed. Kamina sighed and looked up at the star-filled night. "…and he knowingly put himself in incredible danger to protect a helpless stranger. If that alone doesn't say 'hero'…" the noise had lowered to a steady, patient din. "…I don't know what does."

**(6)**

"…" Simon turned the lever of his tunnel drill, taking great care not to apply too much force into the motion. Gentle, rhythmic twists were what he needed now if he was going to get the job done, brute force would cause the bit to skew, creating a paltry trench instead of a sturdy tunnel.

"simon…" someone called his name. He chose to ignore it.

Drilling had always been dirty, dangerous, and nigh-thankless work, but it calmed him, against all odds it was calming him. He just needed to concentrate and drill, and drill, and drill, and drill, and drill, and drill, and not think of how a few choice, bizarre phrases by Kamina could so sour his mood.

"Simon…" the stranger called, still far away.

No, no, no need to think about it, just drill, drill, drill, drill, drill…

"Simon."

"Don't think about wimpy frauds, or laughs over cola, or fat nurses, or stupid alliances, or alternate worlds, or huge monsters, or Yoko especially Yoko, or, or…or how I should have reached Gurren and Lagann meters ago?"

"Simon!"

The trance was broken, and he was alone, in a deep, black hole, with no eerily big mechanical faces staring him in the face. "This can't be right." He found his and Kamina's things were he had left them, dozens of feet above them. The ground hadn't been disturbed for weeks, the walls around him were compact and solid, nothing had tunneled down or around to where he had stashed their Gunmen. "So where..?"

"**SIMON!!!"**

He recognized it now, it was Kamina's! He quickly dug his way through a nearby wall and within seconds had smoothly and swiftly pierced the surface. He poked his head out, blinking in the moonlight, "A-aniki-?" he started to say, only to be tackled out of the fissure by his ally.

"**GET DOWN!"**

Before smashing into the ground, Simon gasped as two lashes of sickly-pink energy crushed the ground he had been lodged in mere moments before.

They tumbled, the whips recoiled back into the forest, Kamina was on his feet first. "Simon we're under attack" he barked. "Where's Gurren and Lagann?"

"I-I don't know!" Simon cried as he looked right, left, down, up and all directions in between in a vain attempt to find their attacker and in a vainer attempt their two Gunmen. "They weren't were I buried them." He looked to the sky, hoping to whatever God lay in heaven that the assailant couldn't fly.

He saw that some of the stars were missing, a black presence blocking them out.

"Hmph." Kamina huffed. "Buried them? Maybe they just dug themselves out for a walk or something."

"That's-that's-!" Simon's scolding was frozen on his tongue, much like his heart, as he saw that the blackness covering the stars was growing and coming towards them. Simon found himself repaying Kamina's earlier gesture sooner than he could have ever wished.

The ground shattered under the weight of the reunion between shadow and master. An inky black claw the color of a starless night tore into the hapless earth like a bolt from god. The spindly arm tensed as the talons anchored themselves. A low moan and the sundering of roots from soil was all that preceded the rising of something grand and terrible.

That's when the sky broke.

All the while, the light around them twisted and convulsed, blinking to a discordant cosmic opera. They looked up to see the heavenly bodies flash and vanish, disappearing into the void.

The moonbeams shriveled. Bands of malicious onyx wrapped about the satellite's powder white complexion, the light of the sun now splayed in zigzag patterns.

The light dimmed, warped and faint, concealing the rising body of dusk, and only granting yellowed fragments of bone and a blood-red orb to Simon's vision.

"Aniki, it looks just like that thing from the pictures, it's-it's an Angel!" he backed away in horror, only to see a titanic, shovel shaped head adorned with two eyespot-like markings rise from the shadowed foliage. "And it's not alone!" he tugged at Kamina's arm. "We have to hide, without our Gunmen, we can't possibly fi-."

Kamina muttered something unintelligible as he stared through the trees. "Simon…"

"What?" Simon demanded, never taking his eyes off of the approaching monsters.

The sound of steel being drawn echoed lifelessly in the dark and Kamina quietly replied. "Found them…"

No sooner had Simon tore his gaze from the Angels, than a quartet of glowing yellow eyes made themselves known from forest: independent, alive, and hungry.

To be continued… 

**(****Misato) Preview:** As night turns into day, Shinji is accosted by the very organization he so diligently served. Has talking to the ragtag remnants of the Gurren Brigade made him a traitor, does it matter that he is or does it all depend if everyone thinks he is? Meanwhile, Simon and Kamina betrayed, attacked by Angels? What the hell's going on here? Next on Neon Toppa EVA Lagann: Don't you know you're just a kid? Or "Against All Odds, Charge!"

**Author Note: **Wow, I sure took my sweet time on this one, didn't I? I could very well blame the fact that I sorta lost track of time playing ICO (found a copy!) which is brilliant by the way, and Street Fighter 4, which is simply awesome. Or how I'll be going to college in a few days and the preparations for the last month have been driving me crazy.

But I have a much more story-related reason for the lateness. Like it or not, this chapter marks the defining moment in any fanfiction crossover: when the characters meet. I had several ideas of how the three characters would react to one another, but the one written here for your pleasure is the path I found most entertaining. I like to surprise people, and having Kamina practically exalt Shinji as the HERO OF TOKYO-3, is something I don't think any of you would ever expect.

Now this is my first time writing Shinji in any story, and though I think I have a pretty good grasp of his character, I'm worried about exaggerating the more angsty portions of his personality, with that said, is he bearable as of now?

No one's brought it up, but there's a reason why Simon and Kamina may look just a little bit too oblivious to modern niceties (if how Kamina was eating 'surface food' was of any indication). Keep in mind, that back in their world, there are no streets or cars or really tall buildings. And in episode 2 of Gurren Lagann, the two revealed that they are largely illiterate, which I thought would work well in the fish-out-of-water element of this story. This does not mean that either of them are stupid, they're just getting used to this dimension.

Simon's aggression towards Shinji stems from an old Johnny the Homicidal Maniac comic where on the verge of killing a loony fan of his that has been morbidly copying his mannerisms, the titular killer answers his doppelganger's statement on how he was "just like" him with a sullen "I don't like myself much." So we find two people that have a lot in common, it's just that they don't like themselves at the moment (Shinji has taken an emotional fall at nearly killing Touji, Simon has nearly gotten Kamina killed with his hesitance), so it's natural they wouldn't like each other.

As of now, with over 13.000 words spanning 28 pages, the addition of this chapter makes this my longest story ever. I try to cram as much content into each chapter as possible, and thus they take a long time. Unfortunately, when my motivation leaves me, I tend to work slower, as writing so much (for me, I know a lot of authors who write way more for each chapter) is rather taxing.

Your reviews may seem like small things, but each one, with their little words of encouragement, really help motivate me, So I know there are a lot of people reading this, and favoriting this, and story alerting this, I'm just asking you guys to review. Because they make me happy, and work fast.


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